You Suck At Parking Business Cards

How To: Absurd Scientific Advice for Common Real-World Problems is the latest satirical (but also funny-'cause-it's-true) release from webcomic xkcd cartoonist and author Randall Munroe...

101 Things to Do with a Huge Willy knows you've seen - maybe even taken - dick pics. But have you seen - or taken - the kind of dick pics illustrated in its collection of "101 inspiring ideas for more useful things you...

If you know a lot of assholes, you know what it's like to deal with their shit. Now, it's time to return the favor. ShitSenders.com enables the shat upon to send steaming piles of Don't get mad, get even to inconsiderate...

Another way to think of the best backhanded gifts is the best gifts for people you don't like, only sort of like, have a love / hate relationship with, or have a beef with, but who for whatever reason you still have to...

This isn't the first time a thong has been compared to dental floss. But with the Oral Me thong underwear, ladies might be more inclined to accept, maybe even champion, the connection. Because here it's not about some...

The Boob Cube is for idiots. And for geniuses. And for idiots who want to convince people they're really geniuses. And for geniuses you want to make feel like idiots. So, yeah, pretty much an ideal gift for any person...

If your favorite pastime is being offended, get ready for hours of fun with Offensive Crayons. And even if you're open to the politically incorrect, unless you're Daniel Tosh politically incorrect, you might wince at...

Cards Against Humanity, in conjunction with (and probably as the biggest reason for) their best ever Black Friday 99% off sale event, has released the Absurd Box. It's a 300-card expansion pack for Cards Against Humanity...

Boy do I hate having to park both the Porsche and the Lambo on the front circle drive. It really detracts from the visual splendor of my gilded front door and Batman topiary. What, a retractable underground parking space...

One guess as to which country the GazeBox hails from. A glorious transparent arc that accordions around your 6-figure sports car? Protects it in style, with pomp, and without hiding it from jealous eyes? Gotta be Italian...

Big picture, no. Villains do not deserve gifts or treats or brown paper packages tied up with string. They're mean. They're hateful. They're evil. But. They're also necessary. For without evil, there would be no good...