Food & Drink

Imperial Spherificator - Turn Any Food Into Caviar

The Imperial Spherificator. Sounds like something you'd find alongside Mega Maid in Lord Dark Helmet's cache of planet-destroying weapons. But in fact, this superbly named device isn't meant for destruction or Mel Brooks...

Standing Mixer Shark Plane Decals

$24.99 from Amazon »

I know you've been looking everywhere for it and now I've found it for you: a way to pimp your KitchenAid. A kit that will make creating cookie dough and kneading bread in your standing mixer look manly and badass. This...

Pepo Watermelon Slicer

$11.99 from Amazon »

Avihai Shurin has done it again!...

Planetary Glass Set

$49.99 from ThinkGeek »

On top of their sweet swirly interpretations of what our solar system would look like if it were made of heat-wrapped glass and sized for juice drinking and candle burning, two things are cool about ThinkGeek's Planetary...

Old-Fashioned Electric/Manual Ice Cream Maker

$81.35 - $105.88 from Amazon »

What's nice about this old-fashioned pine bucket ice cream maker is that it has both a 3500 rpm high torque motor that you can use to make the ice cream and a hand crank that you can tell everyone you used to make the...

Italia Artisan Pizza Oven

$336.57 from Amazon »

It's pricier than a KettlePizza wood-fired pie from your Weber kit, but if for some reason you're not into mixing your grills with your ovens, Camp Chef's Italia Artisan Pizza Oven is still a reasonably affordable and...

The Two Fisted Drinker

$19.99 from Two Fisted Drinker »

One way to be a patriot (official) is to wear red, white & blue. And one way to be a Super Patriot (unofficial) is to wear red, white & blue while blowing shit up and getting completely trashed on the 4th of July. I've...

Triple Beverage Dispenser Backpack

$27.38 from Amazon »

Oh, yeah, butt munch? There's a party in your pants and everybody's coming? Well there's a party on my back and...and...everybody's getting free refills of beer and margaritas while I carry this hot ass beverage dispenser...

Venn Diagram Serving Platter

They say you can use a Venn diagram to solve logic and reasoning puzzles, such as: Half of all Clinks are Clunks, half of all Rattles are Bangs, and half of all Rattles are Clunks. Considering the limited information...

Pub-Nub Bike-Mounted Bottle Opener

$23.49 from Firebox.com »

Most people I've seen riding bikes shouldn't even be allowed to do it hanging on tight and sober, much less fiddling with a bottle and opener on their handlebar and drunk. Nonetheless, this Pub-Nub bike-mounted bottle...

The Big Bobber Floating Cooler

$29.88 from Amazon »

You may not get a bite, but you'll always have a drink. The Big Bobber Floating Cooler holds 12 cans of beer with ice and makes a slow day of float fishing in a redneck's bass boat a helluva lot more enjoyable. The lightweight...

The Naked Cooler

$80 - $120 from Kickstarter »

When I think of a Naked Cooler I imagine a big rectangular box that's really cold and full of naked people. Kind of like a sauna. But cold. And with the exception of myself, containing ladies only. But since that project...

Birthday Drink Floating Candle

$12.61 from Amazon »

As a prelude to presenting your favorite birthday boy or girl with The Joker card and a prank candle that burns 25% apple pie and 75% dirty fart, bring out a nice pint of beer or glass of wine with this floating birthday...

Beer Bottle Stein Lid

$10.99 from Amazon »

With hats off and bottles raised we say Prost! And I'm not talking about the hats on our own heads, but those covering the heads of our beers. These stein lids have been shrunken down and noveltied up to fit over the...

MIITO Heating Rod & Kettle Alternative

$101 from MIITO »

MIITO is kind of like a magic wand that commands the elements. I mean, as long as the elements you want to command are liquid, and your command to them is to boil. An eco-friendly alternative to the kettle, MIITO combines...

NES Cartridge Flasks

$19.99 from Amazon »

Want some pixelated vodka? An 8-bit .08 BAC? With these NES cartridge flasks nostalgic favorites like Super Mario Bros., Duck Hunt, and Mike Tyson's Punch-Out!! become portals not only to good time gaming marathons on...

Star Wars Wine Stoppers & Lightsaber Cheese Knives

$12.50 - $109.95 from Etsy »

Happy Star Wars Day! May the 4th be with you. And, thanks to Zeitgass' Dark Side metal stoppers and lightsaber knives, also with your fine 2004 Cabernet Franc and stinky goaty hunk of barnyard cheese....

Corkcicle Arctican Stainless Steel Can Cooler

$18.96 from Amazon »

If you need the Corkcicle Arctican to keep your can of beer cold for 3 hours, because it takes you 3 hours to drink a can of beer...maybe you should you switch back to cans of sodie. While the company's stainless steel...

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BevPod Slim Cooler

$34 from Bevpod »

Start with a Beer Briefcase. Add some ice. And take away the sense that it should be handcuffed to your wrist. There you'll have the BevPod, an ultra-slim cooler capable of chilling up to 10 cans or 6 bottles in a fraction...

Dragon Cake Pan

$24.99 from ThinkGeek »

What's going to be harder: getting the cake eggs away from the dragon guarding them, or getting the cake eggs out of the Dragon Cake Pan without destroying them? Those with the ambition and determination of Dany Targaryen...

Dutch Lab Cold Drip Coffee Brewers

$310 - $7,300 from Dutch Lab »

Two things I don't know are what Dutch coffee even is and how to make even a cup of regular old coffee in the regular old coffee maker in our staff kitchenette (in fact, an office-wide vote has forbidden me from touching...

Sloth Tea Infuser

$9.99 from Perpetual Kid »

Uh oh. Mr. Sloth dozed off with his ass hanging in a cup of boiling water. And, mmmm, in contrast to skunk ass, sloth ass smells amazing. Like peachberry jasmine sutra. Or is that tranquil strawberry dream?...

Hydrapak Stash Water Bottle

$19.99 from Amazon »

Little punk water bottle. Thinking you can kick back and spread out all over the place. Like you got a first class ticket to ride in my pack. I've got news for you...you...you self-entitled piece of BPA-free plastic:...

Beast Head Shot Glasses

$28 from Molla Space »

Try some hair of the dog from the head of the bear. Become strong like bull with shot from bull. Take off the sheep's clothing with 1.7 ounces of 151 straight from the wolf. Look into the eye of the tiger as it sends...

Serpentine Dragon Mug

$15.44 from Amazon »

This dragon mug is cool enough on its own and all, but the real draw here is the discount. Originally priced at $1,995, at printing this bad boy of fire was on sale for a whopping 99% off! From $2 grand to less than $20!...

Oster Ironman Fitness Blender

Sold Out from Amazon »

Not that I have any shame when it comes to drinking things straight from their containers - milk, OJ, tequila - but sometimes it's trickier to do that with my smoothies and milkshakes on account of the unwieldy and wide-mouthed...

GoStak Twist n' Lock Storage Jars

$10.99 from Amazon »

The makers of the BlenderBottle protein shake shaker also have a way for obsessive athletes, bodybuilders, and dieters to portion out and schlep along their supplements and dry edibles. GoStaks are towers of individual...

Star Trek USS Enterprise Sushi Set

$34.99 from ThinkGeek »

If you thought eating sushi off a wooden boat was good times, just wait until you soy-and-wasabi up your spicy tuna roll in the heart of the USS Enterprise. The most boldly gone of all sushi sets, this nod to Star Trek...

Wingman Shot Glass

$7.95 from Amazon »

Just in time for St. Paddy's Day: super hot girls getting super drunk on shots! And also a swell and enabling 2-person shot glass to prod them along. Ahhh, ain't nothing like a holiday, alcohol, and teamwork to send a...

Pizza Box Oven

$50.95 from Amazon »

It's not delivery. And it's not DiGiorno*. It's homemade pizza from the Cuizen Pizza Box Oven. And it's so adorable I can hardly look at it without squealing. And by squealing I mean feeling an overwhelming urge to smoke...

PancakeBot Pancake Printer

$179 from Kickstarter »

Turn a Picasso...or your own boobie scribbles...into edible, delectable art with the PancakeBot, the world's first pancake printer, and the world's latest entirely unnecessary invention! Mama! I'm tired of circles and...

Mr. Spock & Captain Kirk Salt & Pepper Shakers

$13.64 from Amazon »

After 83 years with us the pure legend who was Mr. Spock is gone. I'm sure we all share the hope that, wherever he and his alter ego, Leonard Nimoy, have gone, they live long and prosper....

Periodic Tableware

$18 - $85 from PT Ware »

Periodic Tableware is one reason why people invent new words. Like "mud-licious" and "puddle-wonderful" and, most appropriate to this case, "geektastic." This collection of scientific glassware transformed into vessels...

Skull Hard Boiled Egg Mold

$6.95 from Amazon »

I think the best ad campaign of all time might be The Incredible Edible Egg. Not only because it rhymes, which is always the best way to present something, and is about food, which is always the best thing for something...

Popcorn Monsoon

One thing that would make Jolene Carlier's Popcorn Monsoon better is if all the popped kernels actually landed in the bowl when they dropped out of the bottom of the machine's Mario pipe. But since the invention is still...

GoSun Solar Stove

$269 from Amazon »

Why use a stovetop, or even a campfire to cook your pork & beans when you can use an evacuated glass tube? The GoSun Sport heralds itself as the fastest and easiest solar cooker available. Able to reach temperatures over...

The Oregon Pint Glass

I'm not much of an outdoorsman. I mean, aside from the occasional paintball fight and walking to the bus stop. So being at the top of a mountain doesn't really appeal to me. But having the top of a mountain in the bottom...

PuzzlePax Collapsible Wood 6-Pack Carriers

$22 - $25 from Amazon »

Stylin', reusable, and non-consuming of space. PuzzlePax makes wooden 6-pack carriers that have all the things you've ever wanted in a 6-pack carrier. Or rather, as honest parents kindly tell the children they had by...

Indoor & Portable Brazilian Grill

$69.99 from Amazon »

Mmmm, Brazilian steak houses. Forget Chinese and Old Country Buffets, these rodizios are the true definitions of gustatory decadence and gluttony. All-you-can-eat grilled meat from the rotisserie, served table side--you...

Taco Toaster

$30.31 from Amazon »

Yo quiero some Super Bowl Sunday carne asada tacos! And not the ones from Taco Bell. I'd like to spend my second half glued to the TV instead of the john this year. Also, I would like 12 lovingly constructed tacos total...

Dragon Wine Bottle Holder

$22.40 from Amazon »

Is it just me or is this dragon holding a wine bottle pretty much, um, adorable? It's definitely cuter than every kid who's ever shown up in my Facebook feed even though I try to unfriend people when they produce offspring...

IceMule High Performance Soft Coolers

$59.95 - $68.95 from Amazon »

In the past I've definitely been known to shove a 6-pack in my backpack in preparation for a hike or particularly long day at school, but I never expected to be able to enjoy it cold when the 10 a.m. thirst took hold....

Party Animals Bottle Pourers

$8 from SUCK UK »

I eat grapes from the hands of cherubs and drink wine from the mouths of rhinos. Here's your chance to do the same. Or if stags and cows are more your thing, Suck UK's line of bottle pourers for booze and oils & vinegars...

Abeego Beeswax Food Storage Wrap

$18 from Amazon »

On top of the fact that plastic is systematically destroying our earth one molecule at a time and stuff, using saran wrap is an enormous pain in the ass. It tears off the roll all jagged and jacked--if it tears off at...

Pan DE Pop! Up! Panda Bread Cutter

$11.98 from Amazon »

One discerning observation the Japanese have made is that Americans don't eat enough pandas. And while bureaucratic export regulations and some malarkey about endangered species have prevented them from selling panda...

PIPEMUGs

$49.99 - $59.99 from ZANG! »

Genius evolves again. The Sola e Sola or, as I like to call it, the Coffee & a Smoke Cup was pretty sweet when we saw it in 2012. But ZANG!'s PIPEMUGs know that 2015 calls for more than just a tiny espresso and a stick...

The Knockout Beer/Water/Gravity Bong

$30 from The Knockout »

I used to prefer my knockouts served as Fireball shots and right hooks, but this Knockout, a new twist on the beer bong, might leave those standards unconscious and bleeding from the ear on the floor. Designed for attachment...

Cabidor Door Storage Cabinet

$172 from Amazon »

Behind Door #1 we have...a full-length pantry of Combos and Cap'n Crunch! And Behind Door #1-1/2 we have...a dozen classic NES cartridges, a coupla Koosh balls, and VHS cassettes of the best porn from my childhood (circa...

Hollow Book Safes with Flasks

$45 - $65 from Etsy »

Leave the gun. Take the cannoli. We'll wash it down with my flask of Remy Martin....

Naomi Spring Nutcracker

$25 from red dot »

Naomi is like one of those girls who is incredibly hot and arousing, but also kind of stony and completely unapproachable. Dare speak to her, or even look at her for one beat too long, and she'll crush your nuts like...

3D Latte Art Maker

Sculpting 3D bears and puppy dogs out of foamed milk to float in a latte seems like a lot of trouble to me. Trouble that will be ruined the instant the jackhole I went to all the trouble for decides she is going to drink...

Refillable Sriracha Keychain

$7 from Sriracha2Go »

I know there are a few problems with this Sriracha keychain. Like in addition to enabling me to deliberately put Sriracha on my breakfast burritos and Philly cheese dips on the go, it's also going to enable me to inadvertently...

Popcorn Bowl with Kernel Sifter

While I'm pretty sure this would be the most expensive popcorn bowl--and maybe bowl period--you'd ever own, if you are a popcorn fiend, or a Sesame Street-style Popcorn Monster, you might like a $75 popped corn receptacle...

uKeg Pressurized Growler

$99 - $129 from Growler Werks »

Stuff like the uKeg, a portable pressurized growler for tap-fresh beer on demand, always comes from Oregon. Those dudes love their microbrews. And they're mad scientific geniuses about flooding the industry with tasty...

The Whiskey Wedge

$19.95 from Amazon »

One thing I can't stomach is getting piss drunk on piss warm whiskey. And though I do enjoy the array of giant cubes and fancy globes and Darth Vader-shaped ice molds now available for me to chill it with, their stubborn...

Mitten Flask

$17.99 from Perpetual Kid »

It's only natural that a company called Perpetual Kid would be selling a Mitten Flask. Ahhh, mittens. I lost so many of them sledding during Christmas vacation as a precocious 7-year-old. And ahhh, flasks. I always had...

Mighty Mug - The Mug That Won't Fall

$20 - $35 from Mighty Mug »

We've all done it: knocked over a cup of coffee/sodie/water/vodka tonic at work and ruined something important. Like my entire week. Jayme Smaldone and his Mighty Mug cohorts blew out an important office computer with...

Prep Pad Smart Food Scale

$101.97 from Amazon »

If you had a Prep Pad bumper sticker it would say, My food scale is an honor student. More than just showing how much the avocado weighs and flashing some pre-programmed nutritional information about a pound of pork loin...

Beer Tree Gravity-Fed Home Brewer

Are normal home brewing kits typically boring and ugly? I don't really know, as I focus more on drinking beer than making beer (best to funnel all of your energy into a single channel and dominate it!) but whatever normal...

Shotshell 20-Gauge Thermos

$27.84 from Amazon »

A 20-gauge shotgun shell thermos that holds only 16 ounces of liquid! Could they not have added 4 ounces so it makes more sense? Why is it so difficult for people to be smart and think logically? Anyway, this Shotshell...

MagicalButter Cannabis Cooker

$159.98 from Amazon »

Easily make medicinal butter, oils, tinctures, lotions, and sauces. Hear that? MagicalButter is so named for its power to convert healing herbs into healing herb culinary creations. So start coughing and breaking into...

Bike-Mounted Leather Beer Caddy

$59.95 from Amazon »

Ahhh, full grain leather, a 6-pack of fine brew, and...physical activity? Blech. Can we swap that last one out for a cigar? No? That would defeat the entire purpose of Fyxation's bike-mounted beer caddy? Well. Alright....

Crock-Pot BBQ Pit Slow Cooker

$80.14 from Amazon »

The worst part of the year is upon us: the end of summer. True, football is starting again and the children who have been littering up your house for the past 2 months will soon be heading back to school, but...winter...

SpreadThat! Heated Butter Knife

$19.95 from Amazon »

I have to say, as superfluous to life as a heated butter spreader is, it would be kind of nice to have a SpreadThat! when I slice off a brick of ice cold Land O'Lakes and then mangle the ever-loving churned bovine secretions...

Wall-Mounted Shark Bottle Opener

$38.50 from Hot Rockin' Belle »

Welcome to Shark Week 2014. Well, we're mere hours from its launch anyway. And you know you're going to want to crack a brew at 8/7 Central Time tonight when things officially kick off. Too late to use this wicked wall-mounted...

DestapaBanana Filling Injector

Are you kidding me? An Argentine made the DestapaBanana flavor injector? Not Ron Popeil or some borderline obese overenthusiastic dude with a pet monkey on Shark Tank?...