57

Caffeinated Cracker Jacks

By: on November 19, 2012
$11.22 - $14.18
Check It Out

Jack's getting Jack'd. Cracker Jack'd packs, permutations of the beloved caramelized popcorn, will begin shipping on December 22, 2012 in a host of flavors and mixes--two of which will be shot up with 70 mg of caffeine per 2-ounce sack. The Jack'd snacks include riveting 21-century combinations such as Salted Caramel, Spicy Pizzeria, PB & Chocolate, and coffee-infused, chocolate-covered nuggets o' Cocoa Java and Vanilla Mocha.

Caffeine additives are marketed as natural, safe, and (in vain) for adults only. Actually, the whole Cracker Jack'd line is geared towards rekindling grown ups' interest in young boys dressed like sailors peddling the popcorn of their childhoods. So far so good, Frito Lay. I want some.

By the way, as a gauge for the impact of 70 mg of caffeine in the Cocoa Java and Vanilla Mocha Cracker Jack'ds, 72 mg is the FDA-recommended safe amount of caffeine for sodie beverages.

Muchas danke to FoodBeast.

Check it out

Power Glow Bioluminescent Energy Drink

Throw away the EL wire and chemical-laced makeup. If you want to look like a club kid, Doctor Manhattan, or a walking biohazard, come the end of 2015 all you'll have to do is gulp & glow. On top of injecting your blood...

Check it out

Grubbin' on the Couch Bowls

It's time for a tactical chowdown. No Netflix marathon is complete without a parade of snacks on the coffee table, and every parade marches better with a bowl of Froot Loops as its grand marshal. Frosted Flakes if you...

Check it out

biem Instant Stick Butter Sprayer

$129 - $159 from Biem »

Whether you're looking to cut back on the butter or blanket your whole life in a dewy sheen of it, the forthcoming biem Butter Sprayer could be as revolutionary for your popcorn and toast as the Slotdog is for your wieners....

Check it out

Dyson Cyclone Belt Coffee Machine

Dyson keeps your life clean, cool, and now--if Jaehyo Lee's concept for a coffee maker comes to percolation--caffeinated. The Dyson Cyclone Belt Coffee Machine repurposes the technology of Dyson's vacuum cleaners and...

Buy Now

Nuvo Eco Ceramic Coffee Bean Roaster

$28.65 from Amazon »

During heating you need swing the Nuvo Eco Ceramic Roaster constantly, drawing an imaginary number "8" or an elliptical orbit. And hold tight to its leather-covered handle. Like in the video above. For, like, two-and-a-half...

Buy Now

Chef'n Cob Corn Stripper

$7.31 from Amazon »

This Cob Corn Stripper (not to be confused with a lady in a cornfield on a Hitch 'Er Up Stripper Pole) better work damn good, and without making a mess, because despite my rant last week about breaking up ground beef...

Buy Now

Punch in the Nuts Snack Mix

$18.99 from Amazon »

Mmmmm, nothing hits the spot like a Punch in the Nuts. This Punch in the Nuts Snack Mix listing includes 6 nut-punching bags filled with cashews, peanuts, chocolate bits, and raisins. Get ready to whack your taste buds...

Buy Now

Pussy Natural Energy Drink

$13.99 from Amazon »

So many ways to interpret the Pussy energy drink. Does it give men in need the bravado to get some? Reinvigorate the nether regions of women who aren't in the mood? Inject some downtown youthfulness into cougars on the...

Buy Now

ManBuckets

$42.99 - $89.99 from Amazon »

Mmmm. Munching on some spicy coated peas from my Sir Racha ManBucket to kick off Saturday morning. To be followed immediately, or whenever my girlfriend says it's ready, by a bacon, mushroom & cheddar frittata drizzled...

Buy Now

KitchenAid Cold Brew Coffee Maker

$79.99 from Amazon »

Cold brew coffee making seems to require a little more finagling and finesse than fixing up a batch of iced tea. And patience. To make it the "right" way you have to let the sweet sludge steep for at least 12 hours. KitchenAid's...

Buy Now

8lb Bag of Cereal Marshmallows

$42.95 from Amazon »

I must have stumbled upon the end of a rainbow because Jack. Pot. My days of spending 15 minutes crouched over my cereal bowl picking out all the boring healthy* brown bits from Lucky Charms are about to be as over as...

Check it out

CLR CFF Clear Coffee

$7.50 - $19 from CLR CFF »

For some coffee clears the mind, but for none does coffee clear the teeth. CLR CFF, perhaps inspired by 1992 and Pepsi's other face-palm moment, and certainly in an effort to pump your body with the physical effects of...