Get ready for the uncontrollable "O" mouth, exhalations of fire, and streaming tears of blissful discomfort only a few Victoria's Secret models, and Bhut Jolokia, the world's hottest pepper, can extract from your otherwise stoic, impenetrable self. Ghost Pepper Super Hot Candy Balls are infused with Bhut Jolokia's over 1 million SHUs of heat. Listen, many of you know what we're talking about when we talk about hot balls, and here we're talking about hot balls. They make Atomic Fire Balls seem like mushy peas, and, in fact, are rumored to be the true cause of death in 93-year-old Fire Ball and Red Hot creator Nello Ferrara's February 8, 2012 passing. Even raw jalapenos come off as a comforting cure for the late-night munchies in the presence of a Super Hot mess. In addition to their ghostly inner core, the outsides of these hard candies are also pepper dusted for maximal coating of the tongue, hard palate, gums, esophagus, and inner cheek flesh. And for only $7.99, you get 4 ounces of approximately 30 balls for you and your best frenemies. Just be sure to keep 'em away from the kiddies...or don't.
Warning: Please wash hands immediately after handling Hot Balls. Please do not touch eyes, face, or any region below the bellybutton prior to this rigorous hand scrubbing.