I bet I know what's been missing from your Christmas mornings: profanity. Lots and lots of profanity. And also Quentin Tarantino (which might explain the lack of profanity). Well guess what, dudes, thanks to toymaker Beeline Creative, the gaping hole in your motherfucking holidays is about to get fucking filled. Talking Pulp Fiction action figures are here, and they are pimped out with movable, posable joints, trademark accessories, and all your favorite F-bombs from the film.
Choose from 13" tall versions of Jules "English, mother fucker, do you speak it?" Winnfield, Vincent "Royale with Cheese" Vega, Jimmie "Don't fucking Jimmie me, Jules!" Dimmick, and Butch "Zed's dead, baby" Coolidge. Each is programmed with between 7 and 12 of his most memorable lines from Pulp Fiction, playable in full via a switch on the figures' right side. John Travolta's Vincent Vega has the most profuse foul mouth with 12 sound bytes, including:
- "All right. Well, you can walk into a movie theater in Amsterdam and buy a beer. And I don't mean just like in no paper cup, I'm talking about a glass of beer. And in Paris, you can buy a beer at McDonald's. And you know what they call a Quarter Pounder with Cheese in Paris?"
- "Nah, man, they got the metric system. They wouldn't know what the fuck a Quarter Pounder is."
- "They call it a 'Royale with cheese'."
- "Play with matches, you get burned."
- "I ain't saying it's right, but you're saying a foot massage don't mean nothin' and I'm saying it does. Now look, I've given a million ladies a million foot massages and they all meant something. Now we act like they don't but they do, that's what's so fuckin' cool about it. There's a sensuous thing going on, where even if you don't talk about it, you know, she knows it. Fuckin' Marcelus knew it and Antwone should have fuckin' known better."
- "Chill Jules, this shit happens."
- "Do you wanna continue this theological discussion in the car, or in the jailhouse with the cops?"
- "Alright, it was a miracle, can we go now?"
- "Aw man! I shot Marvin in the face!"
- "Chill out, man! I told you it was an accident! You probably went over a bump."
- "I was washing 'em. But this shit's hard to get off. Maybe if you had Lava, I coulda done a better job."
- "I got a threshold, Jules. I got a threshold for the abuse that I will take. Now, right now, I'm a fuckin' race car, right, and you got me in the red. And I'm just sayin', I'm just sayin' that it's fuckin' dangerous to have a race car in the fuckin' red. That's all. I could blow."
Adding legitimacy to the obscenity is each figure's facial detail and replica clothing and accessories. Jules and Vincent come with removable guns, Jimmie a cup of coffee and removable slippers, and Butch a whole treasure chest: both the samurai sword and his father's watch, the one Captain Koons wore up his ass for 5 long years.