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Action Figures

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Saturday, June 14, 2014
$10.99 - $79.99 from Big Bad Toy Store »

Behold the Sushi Squadron Shirada, an army of raw fish and rice bound by seaweed and mayonnaise. Or is it? An army, sure. But are those soldiers really seafood-based or are they...yes. That's what I thought. More than meets...

Thursday, April 10, 2014
$301.47 from Amazon »

I still can't believe they once let snaggletooth Kirsten Dunst play Mary Jane Watson. Sideshow Collectibles' statue would have made a better ultimate girl next door than she did just kneeling there silent and unmoving. All...

Tuesday, July 22, 2014
$199.99 from LEGO »

Do you know how many pieces are in the 1,869-piece LEGO Batman Tumbler? D'oh! Crap! I just gave it away! It must be that I'm a little over-stimulated at the sight of this long-awaited, beauteous plastic brick creature that will be mine on 1 September 2014....

Saturday, August 11, 2012
$39.99 from ThinkGeek »

This anatomical view of what lies beyond the high fructose corn syrup and Yellow Dye No. 5 of their epidermises paints Gummi Bears in a new light. Gives them some identity. Some humanity. Makes me feel kind of bad for eating...

Thursday, August 25, 2011
$13,500 from Etsy »

My theory is that this might actually be Optimus Prime and this guy has captured him, found some way of disarming him, and is now trying to sell him. I don't know if I'd be comfortable sleeping with this guy roaming around...

Monday, August 12, 2013
Sold Out from Citizen Brick »

Would LEGO ever produce and release a Breaking Bad Meth Lab? Probably not even if its CEO and Board of Directors were all required to inadvertently step on an errant brick once an hour, every hour of the day, every day for the rest of their lives. Would a company specializing in LEGO-esque bricks and sets ever seek to capitalize on the family-friendly magnate's PG prudeness, and produce and release...

Sunday, March 16, 2014
$21.17 from Amazon »

Not so scary when you're splayed across my coffee table in 20 detachable organs and body parts, are you Jaws? Ow! F- OK, fine. Teeth still sharp in 13" long 4D model. Shark still mildly intimidating....

Friday, February 7, 2014
$149.99 from Gentle Giant »

Ahhh, Darth Vader and Son. The must-have storybook for all dads forced to read their sons storybooks. Jeffrey Brown's re-envisioning of the Star Wars mythos speculates on how a galaxy far, far away might have looked if Darth...

Thursday, May 8, 2014
$225.99 from Amazon »

You and your Armies of the Confederacy aren't so scary at 1/6th your size, are you General? Whoa. What?! Did you just swing one lightsaber in each hand and a third in your left foot at me, Grievous? Crap. You have fully-articulated...

Friday, September 6, 2013

Can you believe that June 7th, 2014 will mark the 30th anniversary of the original Ghostbusters movie? Heady stuff. I feel sorry for myself that I was alive on that release date. But not as sorry as I feel for those of you...

Saturday, May 31, 2014
$224.99 from Amazon »

Whoa, the sixth scale collectible figure of Wolverine as portrayed by Hugh Jackman might look more like Hugh Jackman portraying Wolverine than Hugh Jackman himself. Head sculptor and painter Lee So Young and JC Hong should...

Saturday, June 28, 2014
$47.95 from Amazon »

The Predator bobblehead reminds me that I need to take revenge on this guy with an FJ Cruiser who parks next to me at work. He has a gold Japanese fortune cat mounted on his front dash that is perpetually, menacingly...waving....

Friday, October 11, 2013
$43.90 from Amazon »

Hot Wheels aren't exactly cost-prohibitive so I'll still probably just buy a few when I get a hankering to dick around with toy cars at work, but for the kiddos and handy Daddy-Os out there who dig doing things themselves...

Monday, March 17, 2014
Sold Out from Amazon »

Though Boston Dynamics sets a very high bar with their spastically brilliant WildCat, Robotis still maintains its Bioloid Comprehensive is "not an average robot kit." And given the pretty penny they're asking for it, it damn...

Thursday, May 15, 2014
Discontinued

And the Minifig even looks exactly like Sigourney Weaver! OK, as much as I wanted the life-size Caterpillar Power Loader Dustin Kiska made, I find Ichiban Toys' LEGO version just as enticing and commendable in execution. Plus...

Thursday, August 1, 2013
$208.08 from Amazon »

I have to say, it's a little disappointing to see LEGO, a pastime that has supported content diversity for decades, join the ranks of Keds, toilet paper, and P. Diddy's annual summer party, and go all white. However, I understand...

Monday, September 19, 2011
$100 from Hobby Search »

Everyone knows that Japanese people are out of their fucking minds a little bit eccentric when it comes to... everything, but that's why we love them. This streaking flashing banana, I think, captures that eccentricity pretty...

Friday, November 8, 2013
Discontinued

I love scotch. Scotchy, scotch, scotch. Here it goes down, down into my belly.... I don't know what I like more: that Etsy vendor Albert Hernandi of miniBIGS made a LEGO Ron Burgundy minifig, or that he made a LEGO Scotch...

Saturday, April 14, 2012
$127.49 from Firebox.com »

I see your face on a wedding cake topper, and raise you your face on a Joker action figure. Have people always complimented your Batman-esque jawline? Admired your Superman benevolence? Bowed to your biting Joker wit? Had...

Friday, July 19, 2013
$34.99 from LEGO CUUSOO »

When you get turned into a LEGO Minifigure, you've pretty much reached legendary status in my opinion. So congratulations, Michael J Fox. You badass. And, in adjectival form, check out the badass reason Marty McFly gets to...

Monday, September 19, 2011

These little guys remind me of the characters in the movie 9. This collaboration is pretty cool and comes with a back story and a rabid internet fan base. Each "squadt" can stand alone, or form a part of a large collection....

Tuesday, September 24, 2013

Brian, I'm gonna be honest with you, that smells like pure gasoline. Maybe so, Ron, but might I remind you what the studies show?...

Tuesday, February 4, 2014

25 years of life in Springfield are honored with a potato. Plus some bulbous eyes, a scruffy muzzle, and Woo hoo! a pink-frosted donut with rainbow sprinkles. Mr. Potato Head Homer Simpson has been released as an homage to...

Thursday, January 31, 2013
$24.99 - $37.99 from Amazon »

Just one question: how did Romney as the Ronmy make it into this set of Presidential Monster Action Figures? Some wishful thinker jump the gun on production? Because if we're throwing in any old yayhoo just for running, how's...

Tuesday, May 7, 2013
Discontinued

For $475, a single hunk of solid .925 sterling silver cast as a LEGO Minifigure wouldn't do me much good. But divide that hunk of sterling into 8 separate pieces, and then rejoin them as fully moveable and poseable parts...

Saturday, February 25, 2012
$199.99 from Big Bad Toy Store »

If Tony Montana--or Al Pacino himself--ever wanted a Mini-Me, this would be it. In fact, looking at the photo closeup, it's hard to tell action figure Scarface is indeed only an action figure, he's so expertly designed and...

Friday, November 23, 2012
$15.98 from Amazon »

Did you know the squeezable, talk-raunchy-to-me Miss Naughty Doll also comes in compact, white elephant gift-ready keychain size? Until now, I didn't. I mean, a bookish, wholesome guy like me didn't even know a full-size Miss...

Sunday, June 10, 2012
$150 from Etsy »

Looking for an undead-slaying wedding cake topper? How about an ass-kicking Mini Me? Jessica of Etsy's Jess' Shop customizes zombie and vampire hunter figurines with buyers' own faces and clothing specifications to inject...

Friday, August 31, 2012
$179.99 from LEGO »

I find it somewhat difficult to believe that this is LEGO's first ever haunted house, but according to the man with the German or maybe Nordic or maybe Eastern European accent in the video, what lies before you is indeed the...

Thursday, August 11, 2011
Discontinued

This creature is made from the deaths of other toys.... after they're recycled first to make Al Gore happy. He stands 10 inches tall and has at least 5 different ways of killing you if you count squashing your head like a...

Tuesday, May 14, 2013
Sold Out from Etsy »

One thing I really do not like is cats. Which makes them the perfect subject for a pincushion. Their Star Wars spin trips me up a little--it's going to be way less gratifying to stab a Han Solo cat in the gut than it would...

Thursday, December 29, 2011
$14.60 from Amazon »

There is one in every neighborhood. Her lawn is left unkempt all summer. The paint is slowly chipping away from the outside of her house. You fear having any type of interaction with her. And of course, what she lacks in husbands...

Thursday, August 11, 2011
Discontinued

Just when you thought Chuck Norris couldn't get any cooler. Enter double machine gun Chuck Norris. Set this guy on your desk as a loyal companion, or by your front door as a crap in pants inducing bodyguard or a nice between...

Wednesday, September 25, 2013

Not so scary after all, are you T-Rex? Tinysaur Kits assemble from stamp-sized, laser-cut patterns into 1" behemoths of ancient earth in about 20 to 30 minutes. And although I just made it sound like they do that on their...

Wednesday, January 30, 2013
$59.90 from Etsy »

Oh look, people who understand sports, a 5-piece matryoshka doll set handmade in Russia to the professional or collegiate team specifications of any rabid fan. The featured 49ers set depicts actual players. For example, all-star...

Saturday, September 15, 2012

Mickey Mouse in a gas mask. That definitely looks Disney-approved. And I hear Mousemask Murphy is to be voiced by James Earl Jones in the forthcoming 3D animated film intended to make children insist on sleeping in their parents'...

Thursday, October 6, 2011
Discontinued

Imagine the joy of owning a finger puppet of the man who taught us the joy of painting. That's a serious amount of joy. I got that joy, joy, joy, joy, down in my heart. Where? God, I'm in such a great mood thanks to this finger...

Thursday, September 1, 2011
$15.95 from Amazon »

Not at the table, Carlos. I own this miniature, inanimate, though somehow no less intrusive version of Alan, and the dude has actually woken me up in the middle of the night with his endless ramblings. It almost give me a...

Saturday, September 10, 2011
Discontinued

"When my mother was pregnant with me, they did an ultrasound and found she was having twins. When they did another ultrasound a few weeks later, they discovered that I had adsorbed the other fetus. Do I regret this? No, I...

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