Household

Periodic Table of the Muppets

$18 - $45 Society 6 »

You're going to have to buy a print, T-shirt, hoodie, or tote bag of The Periodic Table of the Muppets if you want to see the details of this comprehensive compilation of Jim Henson's finest because the Internet is showing...

Multi-Position Pillow

$65.51 Amazon »

When I think of a multi-position pillow, I don't necessarily think of sleeping better...or, ahem, sleeping at all...but if this Better Sleep head rest can do as it claims, and prevent my awaking from an otherwise pleasant...

Interactive Ferrofluid Sculptures

Discontinued

In researching all of the uses for Interactive Ferrofluid Sculptures, I found myself continuously returning to one standout: time waster. The hypnotizing borosilicate glass vials filled with mutable elemental amoebas...

PowerChef Tabletop Grill

Discontinued

This electric grill sits on the tabletop. Which means it is going to reduce the amount of time it takes for babyback ribs brushed with KC Masterpiece and teriyaki shrimp kebabs to transfer from its cooking surface to...

Nitinol Shape Memory Paper Clip

$14.08 Grand Illusions »

Nitinol. It's kind of like Rain Main. Has an infallible memory and a habitual state to which it always returns precisely and without fail, but...it doesn't deal with deviations from what it knows very well. Also, it is...

Washmate Portable Bidet in a Bottle

Sold Out Amazon »

I would have thought this portable bidet would be aimed towards things like hiking, camping, fishing, and hunting, but after reading up on Washmate's water-spouting bottle I see it's aimed predominantly towards things...

Portal Couch

Discontinued

One thing I do every night is fall asleep on my couch watching TV. Usually I wake up around 1:30 a.m. and consider the option of relocating to my bed, but I think the last time I actually did this was November of 2010...

Phosforce Laser Flashlight Adapter

For the times you'd rather use the World's Most Powerful Laser to shed light on a situation instead of to incinerate its components, Wicked Lasers' Phosforce flashlight adapter for their Arctic 1W handheld laser pointer...

6-Foot Spider-Man/X-Men Room Divider

It's two-faced! Coincidence, or Marvel sending a subverted message to competitor DC in the form of a room divider? Yeah, I think so too. Shit's getting real here...

SONTE Window Film - App-Controlled Shades

Wi-Fi enabled digital shades that apply to glass surfaces as a 0.4mm thick film, and turn from clear to opaque in a single second at the touch of a button. I'm not easily impressed by things that aren't edible or boobies...

C U Next Tuesday Mug

$9.99 Amazon »

Oh the C word. My friends Constantine, Bartholomew, and I all agree it's pretty much the worst in the English language. Definitely the most heinous mud you can sling at someone. Which makes this C U Next Tuesday, or UNT...

Empanada Maker

Sold Out Amazon »

One time I went to Chile and while others gaped at the glaciers of Patagonia and marveled at the volcanos of the Lake District, I ate empanadas. While they trekked the rolling green hills of fourth-generation farms and...

Han Solo in Carbonite Switch Plate

Sold Out Etsy »

Uh, this one's for the ladies? When the toggle on the Han Solo in Carbonite switch plate is turned on, there will be no doubt Han Solo in Carbonite is turned on. I'm not sure how men--even the most devoted of Star Wars...

Slice a Recipe Cookbook to Improve Knife Skills

One of the first things you learn at Carulla Cooking School in Bogota, Colombia is how to use a knife. That's after you learn one of the first things you learn in Bogota, Colombia, which is how to use a gun (and where...

Mud Jugs - Spill-Proof Spittoons

$19.95 - $39.95 MudJug »

I personally don't dip because I've always thought you have to be a baseball player or type of male who doesn't sob uncontrollably and beg for help from the Baby Jesus upon chewing anything that burns more than a stick...

Kuro Cube - Charcoal Fridge Deodorizer

$25 GNR 8 »

Although my refrigerator is only one in a long and distinguished list of areas around my house that reek, tackling the remnant scents of curdled milk and decomposed lettuce with a Kuro Cube is probably a decent place...

The Oklahoman - Tornado Relief Aid Condom

Discontinued

All proceeds from the Oklahoman condom will benefit disaster relief efforts in the tornado-struck areas of Moore, OK, and all uses of the Oklahoman condom will benefit disaster prevention efforts in the tornado-a-brewin'...

Bialetti Stovetop Percolator

Sold Out Amazon »

Percolator is just an elitist way of saying thing that forces liquid into one end of a solid, such as coffee or tea, and out the other as a way of steeping it. But Bialetti probably felt it sounded more sophisticated...

Sad Shop Graduation Cards

$5 Etsy »

I do not like jobs. It's a greeting card that speaks the truth. For graduates...for me...for you, I bet to, 'ey? Sad Shop's Katie Davis may have designed her whimsical well wishes for those bidding sayonara to the lazy...

TARDIS Fridge Skin Kit

Yikes, $185 for the TARDIS fridge skin kit. But it's customized to fit your specific cooler's make and model, so at least you know it will look as sick in your own kitchen as it does in the one in the photo. And if any...

Snot-a-Mug Egg Separator

$33 Etsy »

People from Maine sure know how to make cooking fun. These earthenware Snot-a-Mug egg separators are made by northeast coast artisans to disassociate whites from yolks such that they whimsically mimic a gruesome bodily...

Desktop Saltwater Aquarium

$210 - $395 PJ Reefs »

"A self-contained, low maintenance REEF that will light up any desk with brightly colored coral." So goes the blurb on PJ Reefs' desktop-sized saltwater aquarium. I have to say, mine eyes are digging the brightly colored...

Weener Kleener Soap

$7.99 Amazon »

I don't think that's how you spell "wiener" or "cleaner", but I'm willing to overlook the mistake on account of the fact that my penis has been bugging me for its own soap ever since it got the wrong end of a bar I used...

Cookie Monster Mug

$27 Etsy »

Designer Samantha Ulrich calls this her Googly Eyed Monster Mug, I guess due to Sesame Street's having a corner on the market of using the words "Cookie" and "Monster" consecutively. Which, on the one hand, is kind of...