Now drive slow, honey, it's not a race. Ha! Clearly that bit of motherly wisdom is a crock, as indicated by this vehicle manufacturer-issued decal right here on my side view mirror. It is a race, Mama. And all of those VW buses, Odyssey minivans, and Lincoln Town Cars behind me are losing! They're losing, 'cause they're losers!
And possibly also because they are physically incapable of reaching speeds over 50, have babies on board, and are on the way to the optometrist to find out their driver needs his cataracts removed.
Though not truly applied by vehicle manufacturers, Objects in Mirror Are Losing Decals are still a new necessity in my life because they deliver what I would consider one of life's simple pleasures: daily reassurance that I am better than everyone I pass on the road. Even if only for a few brief moments after I notice that last dust-eating sucker is driving a cop car. Shake...and bake!
The side view mirror stickers are also available with various car maker emblems flanking them to, er, drive the losing point home. Heh, heh, hilarious! These emblems include Porsche, BMW, Mini Cooper, Honda, and...Chevrolet. Heh, heh, even more hilarious!