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The Womanizer (NSFW)

By: on November 29, 2015
The Womanizer (NSFW)
$189
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Ladies and their lady parts must really like this Womanizer contraption and its suction cuppy O-face of a tip because this is one sex toy I keep: 1) reading about in major publications; 2) hearing all my girlfriend's girlfriends whooping about when she hosts their Bunko & Wine nights; and 3) getting all-I-want-for-Christmas hints about from my own girlfriend. Yeah. I'm not sure if I should be more insulted that she wants me to buy her a vibrator, or that she wants me to buy her a vibrator that costs almost $200. Then again, when something comes with a "100% Orgasm Guarantee" I guess steep surges in both female desire and price tag are to be expected.

The German-made Womanizer lures in ladies and the hapless, gift-buying men in their lives with its PleasureAir technology, a feature that stimulates the clitoris without direct contact. No, I don't know why that translates to longer, more intense, multiple, and no-fail orgasms either, but the number of Amazon reviews containing the word "amazing" in them suggests touchless clitoral stimulation isn't just pseudoscience or lip service.

Well. Maybe a different kind of lip service.

From design and usage standpoints, Womanizers are pretty run-of-the-mill vibrators. They're handheld devices with silicone heads that come in a choice of 6 different colors / patterns, including Black Leopard, Black Tattoo, Blue Crocodile, Pink Crocodile, Purple Snow Leopard, and Red Roses. Each has a bejeweled button in the center that controls the vibrator's 5 adjustable levels of intensity. They are micro-USB rechargeable.