The Skull Ultra Loud Alarm Clock with Bed Shaker
Your alarm clock with the soft hands and sweet voice telling you she made extra fluffy flapjacks for your first day of school? Ha! Mama's gone, dorm kids! This semester you wake up with THE SKULL! A "sweet" 113-decibel sonic siren and a "soft" 12-volt bed shaker that didn't make you jack. shit. for your first day of school. Better grab a mini box of Corn Pops from the dining hall on the way to Chem 101.
A simultaneously awful and awesome gift for a teen, Sonic Alert's Skull Alarm Clock sings Wakey, wakey to the tune of an extra-loud buzzer comparable to the noise level of a chainsaw. A bonus vibrating accessory slips under the pillow to add some unpleasant tactical stimulation to the rise 'n' shine process (but perhaps some very welcome tactile stimulation to other processes ye incoming freshmen might partake in, eh?)
For further flair, The Skull alarm's eye sockets flash bright red and a strip of lights across the center of the clock glow orange.
Sonic Alert does allow users to adjust the alarm clock's tone and volume control. You can also plug in your MP3 player and wake up to your own soothing, happy music instead of The Skull's shriek. Lame.