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Selfie Vibrator with HD Camera (NSFW)

By: on March 08, 2015
$155
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It doesn't have to be a holiday or special occasion to surprise your lady with a thoughtful gift. The Svakom Gaga Sex Selfie Stick even has a foolproof, built-in mechanism for gauging how much she likes it. Come on, sugar lips, say cheese and give me a great big orgasm for the camera!

Just when you thought it couldn't get any better (or more ludicrous) than the butt selfie stick, the Svakom Gaga takes the selfie craze to new depths with its Sex Selfie Stick, a vibrator featuring a built-in HD camera and LED lights at the business end for ladies to record (or watch live on FaceTime!) their orgasms from the inside. Colonel Angus is gonna be so jealous.

The Gaga's illuminated HD camera promises to capture the internal carnival of vibrator fun time in "remarkably clear footage." Its FaceTime compatibility enables other parties (i.e., dude in the room, dude overseas) to get a front row view of the action too. Kind of like an ultrasound at the obstetrician, but without the killjoy element of seeing proof that pretty soon you're going to have a live baby to deal with.

Aside from the bird's eye view of rapidly contracting vaginal muscles it provides, the Sex Selfie Stick is a pretty standard vibrator. Powered by rechargeable battery with 6-speeds, hypoallergenic, and waterproof. It's compatible with Macs for Face Time use, and also includes a software disc for those with a PC.

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Wobbling Willy - Your Face on a Dildo (NSFW)

Dudes, check out the Wobbling Willy's practical application for all those selfies you've been taking. Your face on a dildo. A way, way sexier (and more functional!) gift for your girlfriend than that framed dick pic you...

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Japanese Electric Piston Masturbator (NSFW)

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Note: The Japanese electric piston masturbator's NSFW designation serves not so much as a reminder that this device is not suitable to view at work as it does a reminder that it is not suitable to use at work. I found...

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LaunchPAD - Fleshlight iPad Case (NSFW)

$29.95 from Fleshlight »

Though it's not electric or piston-powered...or Japanese...like this friendly sex toy, the LaunchPAD does employ advanced technology in a valiant effort to enhance Man's alone time. The makers of male masturbatory aid...

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The Big Coloring Book of Vaginas (NSFW)

$12.95 from Amazon »

Is further product description really needed? First there was Georgia O'Keefe, now there is author and illustrator Morgan Hastings. Black-and-white outlines of anatomical wonders beg for your acrylic and Crayola technicolor...

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Images You Should Not Masturbate To

$9.95 from Amazon »

If you're wondering if its title is true, feed your curiosities with the photo of the dog that looks like George Costanza's mom in this book of Images You Should Not Masturbate To. And I thought the salt shaker was bad....

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Muzo - Personal Zone Creator & Noise Blocker

$159 from indiegogo »

Muzo uses anti-vibration technology to turn the world off. (Makes sense, given the number of other devices that use pro-vibration technology to turn the world on--VibeRider, anyone?) At approximately the size and shape...

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Paco's Taco Stroker

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At first I was like, Who the h-e-double-boner named this kitchen tool "Paco's Taco Stroker?" I'm going to make so many masturbation jokes when I write about it. And then I looked closer and was like, Holy hard-on! They...

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Little Rooster Alarm Clock Vibrator

$89 from Amazon »

Oh (face) no, the rooster's crowing (buzzing) already?! Come (yes, please) on! Do I really have to get up (off)? I hear you, ladies. It's a brutal world of mornings, alarms, and orgasms we live in. I'll keep my fingers...

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The Womanizer (NSFW)

$189 from Amazon »

Ladies and their lady parts must really like this Womanizer contraption and its suction cuppy O-face of a tip because this is one sex toy I keep: 1) reading about in major publications; 2) hearing all my girlfriend's...

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The JerkShirt (NSFW)

Now don't take NSFW the wrong way. The JerkShirt was indeed created primarily for the office (and secondarily for the dinner table). But I would caution against watching the video, illuminating as it may be, within eye-...

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The Emojibator (NSFW)

$29 from Emojibator »

"If you can't find a date, emojibate." Some of you will chuckle and others will cringe, but Emojibator creator Jaime Jandler feels all she did was bring an obvious joke to life. And good for her. A little elbow grease...

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Tenga Flip Hole Male Masturbator

$64.10 from Amazon »

Usually when I come across things like the Tenga Flip Hole on Amazon, a random oblong instrument or box with a button, and a title that gives no indication of what the F it is, I just assume it has something to do with...