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Area 51 5-Foot Glow-in-the-Dark Alien Statue

Posted: May 03, 2022
Area 51 5-Foot Glow-in-the-Dark Alien Statue
$1,644.50
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This Alien Statue from Area 51 is pretty much life-size (I mean, aliens seem pretty short, right) at 5 feet tall, and glows outer-space-radioactive green in the dark, so it's obviously a choice pick for anyone getting a jump start on Halloween decorations for the front yard.

But, dang. Halloween is still a ways off. Isn't there something - anything - we dudes and ladies could do with a glowing green man ASAP?

Ooohhh yeeeaaahhh. I'm thinking extra-terrestrial Peeping Creeper-style prank too!

Outside my mama's bedroom window. Outside my friend Cornelius' tent during our annual bro camping trip this summer. Inside my ex-girlfriend Karen's car. Either upright in the passenger seat, or perhaps more covertly stashed horizontal in the back.

What? It's not like I'd break in or something. If she's still the same as she ever was, which I'm frikkin' sure she is, she never locks her car, and is basically begging for someone to load it up with a life-size glowing alien anyway.

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