Sloth Rings
/sloth-ring-7858.jpg "Sloth Ring")
- Sloth Knee Socks - $19.99
- Ask Me Why I'm Lazy Sloth Flipover T-Shirt - $18.99
- Dreaming of Sloths Pillowcase - $19.99
- Life in the Slow Lane Sloth T-Shirt - $18.95
- Hansa Three-Toed Sloth Stuffed Plush Animal - $47.32
My mama says this sloth ring reminds her of me, and although I'm not exactly sure what that means, based on my extensive knowledge of the movie Seven, which I discussed at great length over beers with an abnormally high ABV percentage while some turkey nearby used what was apparently the bar's house charger to juice up his smartphone* last night, I'm pretty sure it's either that I am lazy or that Kevin Spacey is going to kill me.
Teresa MacDonald hand sculpts, paints, and seals her polymer clay sloth creations before mounting them on adjustable silver or antique bronze rings, available in sizes 6 to 10. You know, for a sloth this little guy is pretty undeniably cute. Oh. Now the comparison makes sense. Aw, thanks, Mom.
*Yeah, it wasn't even like he was sitting there with the phone plugged in right beside him--the phone was next to me on the arm of a couch and he was seated at a table a full 10 yards away. Well you know what, dude? I saw all of your incoming texts from Jill Hot Food Truck Girl and I forwarded every one of them to your wife.
McWhinney Active Wedding Rings
Jeff McWhinney designs wedding rings for men who move. Like a little more than from their desk to the john, the car to the house, and the couch to the fridge. Hikers, golfers, climbers, weight lifters, even really intense...
/the-ring-clock-9112.jpg?mode=crop "The Ring Clock")
The Ring Clock
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Moonglow Rings
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/touch-real-time-heartbeat-23458.jpg?mode=crop "TheTouch Real-Time Heartbeat Rings")
TheTouch Real-Time Heartbeat Rings
Want to feel close to a loved one far away? Or in the next room when it's too much work to get up off the couch? As part of their mission to "make the most personal connecting tools," TheTouch is finishing up development...
Meteorite & Dinosaur Bone Rings
If your special someone is really that special, you won't just give them a ring, you'll give them a ring from a bazillion years ago! A ring that symbolizes how grand, vast, and enduring your love is. A ring that proves...
/nfc-programmable-smart-ring-31165.jpg "NFC Programmable Smart Ring")
NFC Programmable Smart Ring
At this point you could put a different type of smart ring on every one of your fingers if you wanted. The NFC Ring is a programmable piece of smart jewelry you can wave around powerful wizard- or dismissive CEO-style...
Femme Fatale Ring Gun
Ladies with a vendetta, or a penchant for jewelry that also serves as a weapon, I'm afraid you can't buy the Femme Fatale Ring Gun. (Unless the person who paid $11,350 for it at auction would be willing to sell it to...
/qalo-wedding-rings-for-18446.jpg?mode=crop "QALO Wedding Rings for Athletes")
QALO Wedding Rings for Athletes
QALO, you win. Best line I've read all month: "After getting married we realized what a nuisance wearing our traditional wedding band was." I know, right? Suddenly women at after-work happy hour are turning down your...
Fidget Rings
Maybe you fidget because you're anxious. Because you're bored. Because you have ADHD. Because you're 5 minutes away from walking into the biggest interview of your life. Because you just drank 11 cups of coffee. Now fidgeters...
Anatomical Gummi Bears
This anatomical view of what lies beyond the high fructose corn syrup and Yellow Dye No. 5 of their epidermises paints Gummi Bears in a new light. Gives them some identity. Some humanity. Makes me feel kind of bad for...
Kinekt Moving Gear Ring
Kinekt's Gear Ring reminds me of that ditty "The Wheels on the Bus" except, unlike the song, the ring has a fully integrated design of micro-precision, stainless steel gears instead of rubber tires that go round and round...
/the-accuser-ring-with-blinking-60692.jpg?mode=crop "The Accuser Ring with Blinking Opal Eyes")
The Accuser Ring with Blinking Opal Eyes
J'accuse! this humanoid ring and its opal eyes that actually blink of...being awesome. Made by Levon Kevorkian and sold through his Internal Affairs jewelry studio, The Accuser Ring will tell everyone you meet that your...