16 Products to Help You Host a Better Dinner Party
These 16 products to help you host a better dinner party won't do all the work for you - you'll probably need a caterer, or your mama, to fill in some pieces here and there. But if you're hoping to create a few Big Night-caliber memories, books for cooking and food & wine pairing, unique and funky bar tools, unique and funky kitchen tools, and of course, a party game and some weed will put you well on your way.
Note: These 16 products to help you host a better dinner party are priced as they were listed at printing. Pricing, and availability, are subject to change.
What to Drink with What You Eat
What to Drink with What You Eat is exactly what it claims to be: The Definitive Guide to Pairing Food with Wine, Beer, Spirits, Coffee, Tea - Even Water. My wife owns the book, and it's like her bible. No joke. She'll read about holy merlot before bed, get a few blaufrankisch hallelujahs in when she wakes up, and if we're having a dinner party - it's intense sauvignon blanc spiritual study and exploration of pinot noir for days beforehand.
Having flipped through What to Drink with What You Eat myself, I can't blame She-Ra: Princess of Power for her attachment to it. I'm not as into wine as she is, but this thing covers everything. Beer, whiskey, sake, coffee and other non-alcoholic drinks; Kool-Aid is pretty much the limit. And its organization, with reference-guide-style sections listing foods in alphabetical order to find a drink to pair, and then wine, booze, etc. in alphabetical order to find a food to pair, makes accessing information real easy.
Designer Duffy London says their reimagined piece of the playground makes for a whimsical dinner table. Yeah right. Like it isn't hard enough for me to transport food from my plate to my mouth when stationary. Could add an element of intrigue, and a great opportunity for a little friendly coordination competition, to the dinner party, though.
Hanging Disco Ball Planter
Don't panic, plant it at the disco! This Hanging Disco Ball Planter brings some sparkle to your greenery and blooms, and the ambience you set for your guests. Especially the greenery and blooms, and guests, you can't quite cultivate to look like they actually enjoy living in / visiting your house.
In addition to reflecting light and giving your plants an excuse to party day and night, the Hanging Disco Ball Planter also helps keep them well-fed with its self-watering design.
Raclette Cheese Melting Machine
This raclette cheese melter's hovering heating element radiates down onto wedges or wheels secured beneath it to produce bubbly-hot layers of cheese you can scrape right off the top. The effect isn't just a delicious one for your breads, meats, vegetables, and belly, but also a pretty spectacular one for your dinner parties and buffets.
The Crispy Rice Cooker
My friend Al from junior high's mama was Persian and used to make crispy rice every time I stayed over for dinner. Have you had crispy rice? Have you experienced its golden crust giving way to a glutinous, chewy spread of perfectly hydrated grains? Dude. I have to wipe away drool...and other fluids...just thinking about it. Crispy rice is like the crack of rice. And once you go rice crack, trust me, you'll never go back.
Dangerous Experiments for After Dinner
Dangerous Experiments for After Dinner: 21 Daredevil Tricks to Impress Your Guests should be the party gift of the summer. From sabering a bottle of Champagne to hanging a pear on a string over 2 criss-crossed knives, and then cutting the string to quarter the pear (?!) this daredevil deck of stuff to do besides talk about religion and politics is sure to be a big hit at your next gathering.
It also might make a colossal mess, destroy the porcelain spaniel figurine your wife's grandma gave her, and put someone's eye, but hey. Most of the best parties do.
The Food Lab: Better Home Cooking Through Science
How do I pan-fry a steak that has a tasty charred crust but a manfoodly bloody interior from edge to edge when I cut into it? How do I make Kraft Mac & Cheese without using a box of Kraft Mac & Cheese, and that actually tastes way better than Kraft Mac & Cheese? How do I not F up Hollandaise? How do I make everything I make perfect, and not just once, but every time I make it?
If you share any of these quandaries, or any of hundreds more included in The Food Lab: Better Home Cooking Through Science, author J. Kenji Lopez-Alt and the wonder of science are here to revolutionize your cooking exploits. The cookbook examines classic American dishes from a scientific perspective, discussing the interactions between heat, energy, and molecules that occur while preparing them, and sharing simple techniques for achieving better, consistent results. Over 1,000 full-color photographs help lead the way.
Sasquatch Cocktail Shaker
How do you feel about Home Wet Bar's decision to incorporate attributes of a mythic beast of the forests into one of their cocktail shakers? Right. The same as you'd feel about getting a full-body rubdown from Angelina Jolie: stoked and in like Flynn, yet moderately intimidated to slightly scared and doubtful of your ability to handle it.
The Sasquatch Cocktail Shaker is a drink peddler of formidable size intended either to be approached strategically by the 10 people at your dinner party , or faced bravely by a lone guest with balls the size of The Rock. Note: I did not say balls the size of The Rock's balls. Because I mean balls the size of the entirety of The Rock.
Filthy Rich Cocktail Napkins
Buying Filthy Rich Cocktail Napkins is an investment. An investment in the whimsical fun they'll bring to dinner parties with BBQ ribs, chicken wings, loaded burgers, and finger foods, such as giant bowls of Cheetos, Fritos, and Doritos.
Korean BBQ Coffee Table
A Korean BBQ Coffee Table almost guarantees you'll throw a spectacular dinner party. And also that you'll ruin your couch, chairs, carpet, and coffee table itself in the process. Spectacularly. But, hey, what's a new set of living room furniture when it comes to being the host and hostess with the most and mostess?
Vaportini Liquor Inhaler
A glass globe-and-funnel contraption straight out of the Real Genius chem lab, the Vaportini kit gassifies alcohol into a breathable cloud of intoxication. Instant intoxication. Calorie-free intoxication. Yes, I agree. The Vaportini is both the best and worst* culinary invention ever created.
*Vaportini reps suggest that the vessel's speedy kick-in characteristic actually advocates responsible drinking. Since we feel the liquor's effects shortly after exhalation, our typical desire to knock another one back right away - or in this case, hit the straw again - subsides. However, the idea is based on the assumption that people understand what it means to have too much of a good thing, that less is more, and that overconsumption is a fundamental plague of the 21st century. Most people do not understand these things.
Top It Germ-Thwarting Cake Shield
The Top It Cake Shield is a food-safe, flame-resistant cover for rectangular, round, and single slices of cake. It is designed to allow for candle insertion in its own plastic cover rather than the cake itself, keeping any flying spit, which is both gross and potentially germ-infested for anyone who didn't eject the spit, at bay. The Top It is obviously of particular interest during these global pandemic days of aerosol infection, but I'm sure the doctor-invented cake shield will still have its place amongst parents and the germ-averse even once COVID concerns aren't so prevalent.
MagicalButter Cannabis Cooker
MagicalButter, or MB2, is a kettle-sized device that extracts the THC from cannabis (plus botanicals from other herbs if you're into that sort of thing) and incorporates it into base ingredients for elaborate feel-good drinks, entrees, and desserts. Or just a nice piece of feel-good buttered toast. In a few simple steps and the literal push of a button, the cooker's micro-processor controls will draw out the herbs' botanicals and fold them into butter, oils, and alcohols. It can produce both food and skincare products in as little as 2 hours.
See, dudes, hosting a better dinner party can be as easy as 1...2...weeeeed!
Miracle Berry Fruit Tablets
Not the next Top Chef? No worries. These amazing miracle berries are eaten before meals to make the meals taste better. "How?" you ask. By making sour and bitter foods taste sweet. I have tried these and they do work. Don't believe me? Take one and eat the best tasting lemon you've ever had.
Silikomart 3D Silicone Baking Mold
Oooh, that Silikomart 3D Silicone Baking Mold creation on the left looks like my mama's Flamingo Surprise Jell-O Salad got its hybridization on with a big hunk of Cherry Laffy Taffy. What's even cooler is that what it really is is a mirror-glazed cake the 3D mold was able to turn into such a trippy optical illusion.
While perhaps not as impressive as Dinara Kasko's Geometric Cake Molds, the Silikomart 3D Silicone Baking Mold appears to be a little more user-friendly. And Kasko herself seems to approve of the Silikomart approach, as the two have collaborated on a couple of the cake molds in her collection.
After Dinner Nipples - Mint Chocolate Boobies
Care for a nip of mint to cleanse your palate? ... And dirty your mind? After Dinner Nipples are mint chocolate boobie treats made in the spirit of After Eight Mints, and molded in homage to mankind's other favorite after dinner treat.
Those of you who like to keep abreast of the latest food trends probably know that After Dinner Nipples are just one of many human body part confectionaries available to you. And I'm not just talking Conversation Hearts and gummy feet here. We have Edible Anus Chocolates and After Dinner Nipples' male counterpart, After Dinner Willies, too. All three are delightful sweet treats to serve your guests as their last bite, and best way to make sure they never forget the dinner party you threw.