Household

Mitsubishi Electric Bread Oven

$248.65 Amazon »

"Mitsubishi Electric Bread Oven" is a fancy way of saying "Toaster from Japan." And they should add the subtitle, "That Can Toast Only 1 Slice of Bread at a Time." And then possibly the sub-subtitle, "But It Will Be the...

Englander Microfiber Air Mattress

$99.95 - $159.95 Amazon »

It's not really in my best interest to make my overnight houseguests as comfortable as possible, seeing as I wish most of them would leave about 2 hours after they arrive. But I still support the Englander Microfiber...

Joydeem Foldable 3-Tier Electric Food Steamer

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All that hot air that's been circulating around the news and social media, society in general, the past few...4-ish...years? Joydeem decided to put it to good use inside their electric food steamer, a 3-tiered foldable...

66-Hour Cordless Lamp

How does the 66-hour cordless lamp burn for a whopping 66 hours per 1-1/2-hour charge? Simple. The little green men living inside juice it up...

Dhyan Multi-Mode Zen Lounger

Sorry, dudes, as much as you and I might want to kick back in the living room amongst a garden of calming plants, or in the middle of a stone-filled pool bubbling under our asses, the Dhyan zen lounger is just a piece...

Dad Grass Hemp CBD Pre Rolls in Screw Decoy Box

$37 Dad Grass »

Dad Grass isn't quite as illicit and un-Dadly as it sounds, but it's not entirely innocent - like a reference to the grass stains on Dad's New Balance sneaks after mowing the lawn - either. Dad Grass smoke packs contain...

Object Rights Curved Flatware

$200 - $300 Object Rights »

Object Rights made this curious Curved Flatware so your fork, knife, and spoon can exist "in harmony with your circular plate." But what about the harmony with your hand and mouth? I'd like to see a demo of someone successfully...

Todco Roasted Garlic Express Electric Roaster

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The Todco Roasted Garlic Express Electric Roaster: for when you need bad breath, stat!...

Inflatable Dummy Automatic Shirt Dryer & Iron

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This dude will puff up his chest and dry and iron your shirts all day long, every day you've got laundry, for a single payment of, like, a hundred bucks. What a dummy...

Scheurich USA Watering Can & Mister

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For some reason, this watering can crossed with a spray bottle from Scheurich USA looks about as funny to me as a golden retriever crossed with a camel. As strange as a penguin crossed with a kitten. As ludicrous as a...

The Factory Concrete Rolling Ball Kinetic Sculpture

The Factory, Material Immaterial Studio's latest concrete rolling ball kinetic sculpture, is a nod to Brutalist architecture, and our desire to own stuff we can fiddle with to spur creativity, or just take a mental break...

The Mandalorian: The Child Echo Dot Stand

$12.95 Amazon »

Please tell me The Mandalorian: The Child Echo Dot Stand also comes with a feature that allows you to change Alexa's wake word to "Baby Yoda."...

Pee-Litical Targets

$23.99 Amazon »

Pee-Litical Targets know that when you wake up in the middle of the night having to take a leak so bad you can taste it, you need 2 things: 1) A motion-activated night light in the toilet so you don't miss the bowl; and...

FLYK Multi-Purpose Package Opener

I hope I can give the FLYK package opener a big ol' LYK because I spend at least an hour and 5 papercuts a day opening packages these days. Maybe it's a cardboard box with an Amazon shipment. Maybe it's the 3 cardboard...

Magnetic Decorative Garage Door Hinges & Handles

$11.68 - $39.99 Amazon »

Know how I know about these magnetic decorative garage door hinges and handles? Yep, that's right. My mama got them. "No drilling!" she said when she first showed them to me. "No damage!"...

The Piss Pad - Urine Splashback Diffusing Target

$15 New Normal »

I don't have the urine splashback problem The Piss Pad diffusing target claims to solve anymore because I've been sitting on the toilet to pee since about week 3 of the covid. Why, you ask? Because that's when I got my...

Maxcraft Stubby Claw Hammer

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If I had a Maxcraft Stubby Claw Hammer / I'd-a hammer in the morning / I'd-a hammer in the evening / And then I'd snuggle up with it in be-ed / Because this hammer is ti-ny! / This hammer is a-dor-able! / This hammer...

FLEXIT Flashlight

$21.99 - $49.99 Amazon »

Of all the flexibility and flexible things I could have in my life, I never would have guessed a flashlight would be one of the most valuable. The FLEXIT is a bendable, wrappable, and, thanks to its magnetic rubber base...

Mr. Potbeard Bamboo Stash Box Kit

Discontinued

Ready to roll? No? Perhaps it's because you don't have a Mr. Potbeard Bamboo Stash Box Kit yet. No grinder, no prep tray, no poking tool, no airtight storage containers and activated charcoal odor-absorbing sack to protect...

The Mandalorian The Child Chia Pet

$17.58 Amazon »

Pinnacles of cuteness unite! The cutest being ever, The Mandalorian's The Child, has been incorporated into the cutest houseplant ever, the Chia Pet. Between Baby Yoda and the Lamborghinetta Tractor I posted yesterday...

Miniature Cash Box & Piggy Bank

$8.99 Amazon »

Save your coins, store your cash, maybe even hide away your stash inside this miniature cash box / piggy bank combo. Available in red and black, the shrunken register measures 4.9" x 3.7" x 2.3", and has a coin slot on...

Atomic Age LED Metal Desk Lamp

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Based on Niels Bohr's Atomic Model, the Atomic Age LED Metal Desk Lamp will definitely make you smarter if you study by its light. For example, high school students will be able to rock their SATs right into the Ivy League...

Orgasmic Man Soap Dispenser

$23.95 Etsy »

When I see this - a true masterpiece in fine art - it reminds me of another masterpiece, the musical masterpiece "Get Low" by Lil John & The East Side Boyz. And specifically the song's refrain: To all skeet skeet, motherf**ker...

Auxx-lift Motorized Garage Storage System

$1,039 - $2,549 Auxx-lift »

While the Auxx-lift images and video (and name for that matter) look like something straight out of a Bob Vila special, I can assure you this motorized garage storage system is a modern-day organizer and space-saving...