Ctrl+Alt+D*ckhead: regain control of your life...or at least your PC. No? Too cumbersome to have to press a giant pink penis with a face on it every time you need to delete something? OK, how about installing the Dickhead Keycap on one of your function keys, and setting it to ping your boss or call up the @username of your most hated Twitch rival each time you press it?
Dickhead Keycaps are made of PVC, strong and durable just like your own dick if you're lucky. They're compatible for swapping with most Cherry MX switches, and come* in your choice of 7 different funky faces, each with a lil' butt crack 'round back, and hands clasped together in prayer at the front, as if to say, "Oh boy, oh boy, I hope I get (key)stroked today."
*I mean, not literally. D*ckhead Keycaps will not spurt all over and ruin your keyboard.
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