Desserts

Freeze-Dried Ice Cream Sandwich Bites

$4.50 - $9 Etsy »

You could call these Freeze-Dried Ice Cream Sandwich Bites frozen treats that have been frozen so hard they unfroze. Freeze-drying, or blasting something cold and then sucking it dry, is a crazy process, dude. And if...

Pint of Cinnabon Frosting

$5.99 Cinnabon »

If the holidays are good for anything, they're good for grabbing a spoon and a pint of Cinnabon Signature Frosting, and digging in with no regrets. The most wonderful time of the year? Psshhh. Not a chance, but 30 minutes...

Giant Party Size Twinkies Baking Kit

$53 Amazon »

Twinkie, Twinkie little star / how I wonder what you are...still doing in your giant Party Size Twinkies baking pan. Get! In! My! Belly!...

Internet Cookies - A Cookie Subscription for Foodies

$20 - $75 Internet Cookies »

Oh Internet, I will definitely accept these Cookies. If you're a sweet snack monster, and maybe even more so if you're a foodie who needs more than the "C" in "cookie" to make it good enough for you, check out Internet...

Ben & Jerry's Netflix & Chilll'd Ice Cream

Yes please I would like some Ben & Jerry's Netflix & Chilll'd ice cream. I'm not sure why the needed the 3rd "l" to make it "Chilll'd" though. Maybe it's some subtle innuendo about a Netflix & Chill threesome. Like, you...

French's Yellow Mustard Ice Cream

I'm all for a National Mustard Day (August 3) but a French's Yellow Mustard Ice Cream to celebrate it? Uh, no th-...well, OK. I'll try it...

Stuffed Puffs Chocolate Filled Marshmallows

$3.98 Wal-Mart »

Forget S'mores, in filling jumbo marshmallows with milk chocolate, Stuffed Puffs just brought my favorite childhood competition of seeing how many marshmallows I can stuff in my mouth without needing the Heimlich back...

Cookie & Pretzel Ice Cream Cones

$7.50 Vat 19 »

Nothing against plain ol' wafer cones here, but as the great Cookie Monster would say, Coooooookie?! And likewise, the great Pretzel Monster, Pretzelllllll?!...

The Dirty Cookie Shots

Sold Out Amazon »

In theory, buying The Dirty Cookie's Cookie Shots is way more expensive than buying a Milk & Cookie Shot Maker and baking the chocolate-lined cow-juice-and-booze-slingin' treats yourself. But remember, time is money...

Cado Avocado Ice Cream

They just couldn't stop at toast, could they?...

FattyCakesNY Ridiculous Cookie Cakes

$30 - $75 FattyCakesNY »

FattyCakesNY is cookies. On cookies. On cookies. With an occasional brownie and donut layered in for some textural variety, plus fillings and toppings of frosting, caramel, ganache, candy bars, and more sprinkles than...

Milk & Cookies Shots

$29.99 - $59.99 The Dirty Cookie »

Now that the Cookie Monster has had his fling with Siri, maybe he can engage the services of Alexa to order him a dozen...or 8 dozen...of Dirty Cookie's Milk & Cookie Shots. I can't wait to see what he gets up to while...

Halo Top Eat-the-Whole-Pint Healthy Ice Cream

$3.99 - $5.99 Amazon »

This is the Halo Top pitch: 240 to 280 calories per pint*, and it more than doesn't suck. In fact, get a jar of PB2, mix some of that powdery peanut butter goodness into a personal vat of Halo Top Chocolate, and you won't...

La Salamandra Argentinian Dulce de Leche

Sold Out Amazon »

Amongst all the cows Argentina is known for converting to internationally-renowned ribs and steaks there must be a few they keep around and milk for converting into what is apparently also internationally-renowned dulce...

Chocolution Exploration Kits

Sold Out Chocolution »

One swell habit I developed over the holiday season was eating large quantities of food. Particularly those containing bacon and chocolate (usually separately, but sometimes together). So my New Year's Resolution is to...

Bacon Chocolate Covered Oreos & Twinkies

Sold Out Amazon »

Oreos and Twinkies topped with bacon and then dipped in chocolate. This is what I would call the Trick-or-Treating Mother Lode. At least before wackjobs started putting needles and poison into their homemade treats for...

Viveltre Gourmet Marshmallows

$5.99 - $9.99 Viveltre »

Today's Lesson: If you're going to eat...hold on, let me count...30 jumbo marshmallows for breakfast, they may as well be jumbo marshmallows that are F'ing. Delicious. Viveltre, confectioner and administrator of my lesson...

Cake in a Can

$7.25 - $9.07 Not on the High Street »

The Food Ministry makes Cake in a Can. Well, really they mix up dry cake ingredients and seal them inside an adorable cylinder of recyclable metal. Then they ship them to people who are too lazy or inept to follow the...

Cheeseburger Cupcake Brownies

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I guess you could make cheeseburger cupcake brownies yourself if you know how to bake cupcakes and brownies, and apply icing without squirting it all over your kitchen cabinets, but I don't. Also, things always taste...

Turkey Ice Cream Cake

$32.99 Baskin Robbins »

A merger of my two favorite things in life--ice cream and stuffing my face--Baskin Robbins' Thanksgiving Turkey Cake is back. Its return wasn't guaranteed. No, the layers of Mint Chocolate Chip and fudgy partitions shaped...

Beer Ice Cream

Getting drunk and eating an entire pint of ice cream are typically consecutive events anyway, so why not combine them into one? Meet The Brewer's Cow, premium beer ice cream made from Guinness, Sam Adams, Ten Penny Ale...

Easter Egg Cake

$79.95 Williams Sonoma »

Easter is only two weeks away. Do you have your cutesy, themed, pastel dessert for the impending gorge of post-egg-hunt ham and sweets? Let the kids eat the jelly beans and Peeps. And especially the real Easter eggs...

Doughnut Cookies

$49.95 Williams Sonoma »

Uh oh, the Cookie Monster and the Po Po are about to have a conniption. Doughnuts and cookies gettin' it on? Producing offspring? And just in time for your co-worker's retirement party, your "Sorry I'm an asshole" peace...

Peanut Butter Cup Cake

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A gargantuan mail-order Peanut Butter Cup Cake, stacked with double layers of rich chocolate devil's food hugging real peanut butter filling, and then drowned in a dark chocolate shell, is the reason acronyms like OMFG...