Man of Style? Unique Men's Fashion & Accessories
What is a man of style? Gucci suits and Rolex watches, or a dude who sports more unique men's fashion and accessories? Whether you're the kind of guy who likes to dress ready for the runway in tailored pants and fresh-pressed button-ups, or the kind who prefers a more standout, individual look, this roundup has you covered.
Check it out: a sometimes slick, sometimes zany, sometimes hideous, always unique collection of men's fashion and accessories.
Note: Men's fashion and accessories prices are approximate, and listed as they were at printing. Prices are subject to change.
Cufflinks that brandish all-caps disclaimers and warnings? My interest is piqued. Sparrows, peddler of lock picks and other Houdini-style tomfoolery, brings wily dudes Uncuff Links, wrist adornments that inconspicuously incorporate a universal handcuff key into their design. In an elegant display of dual function and synergy, the concealed uncuffers will both open almost all standard handcuff locks, and keep all French shirt cuffs tightly closed. Imagine the Bond-style fun you can have sneaking off with the girl from HR during Friday happy hour.
Suitsy Business Suit Onesie
An important meeting with the Japanese investors? Or a big interview? Or your great aunt's funeral? When formality is required, but comfort still tantamount, The Suitsy is here not only to bedeck you like Bond, but also to snuggle you like a pile of declawed kittens.
This business suit onesie was designed for men seeking relaxation without the frumpiness. The pants have a straight-leg cut and the jacket a lightly-tailored sports coat feel. Built-in hidden stretch panels help The Suitsy achieve a perfect fit and retain its shape during wear. A zipper beneath the dress shirt's faux buttons allows for suit onesie loading and unloading. Note: It is unclear whether or not the pants also have a zipper and butt flap for unloading other stuff.
Stone Island Ice Knit Thermo-Sensitive Sweaters
When I first saw Stone Island's Ice Knit thermo-sensitive sweaters I was like, Hey, those Hypercolor sweaters are cool. And then I saw their price and I was like, Oh, that must be in Mexican pesos. But no! Prices are listed in US dollars! Are you pulling my thermostat, Stone Island? $1,500 for a color-changing sweater when I got the T-shirt version in the 90s for $11.99? Even with inflation, it would only be about 20 bucks today.
But I guess high - Everest high - is the price you pay for sportswear when it's from Stone Island, an Italian company whose founder, according to their website, is "the genius that is Massimo Osti, Art Director and Bolognese intellectual."
Ombraz Unbreakable, Armless Sunglasses
Though Ombraz sunglasses are pronounced Ohm-bruhs, don't let their inclusion of the sound bruh kill your interest in them. Because Ombraz actually do two very un-douchey things to sunglasses. One, they remove the snappabble, warpable, loseable sidearms or hardware, replacing them with an adjustable cord to hold the Ombraz snug to your face. And two, according to their Seattle-based designers, who probably have a lot of experience sitting on or otherwise crushing their sunglasses due to never needing sunglasses in Seattle, Ombraz are unbreakable.
Grass Flip Flops
Feel the lushness of nature sprouting between your toes whether you're trekking through the Mojave, or duking it out in the boardroom. KUSA's grass flip flops are made of Syn-Turf, a synthetic material whose blades conform to, and eventually take the shape of, the contours of your feet. It's soft, supple, comfy, and precisely replicates the bucolic serenity of walking through an emerald pasture, minus the near certainty of stepping in a pile of dog shit.
(That said, I would like to point out that if you thought your dog pissed on your shoes before....)
Baker Miller Naptime Hoodie
According to maker Vollebak's science, the Baker Miller Pink Hoodie "floods your vision with a shade of pink designed to lower your heart rate." In full-frontal-zip mode its face-masking mesh visor cocoons you into a state of calm, summoning your parasympathetic nervous system and its vibes of rest and recovery. And so you don't feel like you're in a body bag, the Baker Miller mesh allows you to see out of it, but no one else to see in. It also encourages nose breathing, which forces slower, more controlled breaths, and brings on further relaxation.
It also ensures you can still see that you're a dude wearing a pink hoodie.
Vibram Unisex Furoshiki Wrap Sneakers
Vibram took inspiration for their Furoshiki concept from Japanese gift wrapping techniques. The "free-form footwear" is made to provide as much protection, grip, and comfort as it is "WTF is on your feet?!" reactions from friends, family, and the dudes who start to ask if you want a shoeshine.
Furoshiki uppers are made of stretch fabric to conform to whatever shape, oddities, or conditions your feet have. They hold shut with a hook and loop closure system. You can even machine wash these sneakers on cold (don't put them in the dryer though.)
An explosive fusion of futuristic design, cutting edge materials, and polarized lenses calibrated to quash the effects of the cancer ball in the sky, Parasite shades may have leapt straight from the face of Bill & Ted's time traveling Fairy Godfather, Rufus, onto...the screens of dudes who are going to be as polarized as Parasite about whether these sunglasses are unique and cool, or hideous and pretentious.
Carbon6 Forged Carbon Fiber Lume Rings
Lamborghini was the first to show us Forged Carbon Fiber in 2010, using it to form lightweight parts for their cars. The fibers are "forged" because they've had both heat and pressure applied to mold them into desired shapes. Lamborghini's process of forging is proprietary, so Carbon6 developed their own methods of maintaining carbon fiber's strength and lightness, while weaving it into the sweet marbling patterns you see in their rings.
Carbon6 also fashions rings from hammer-welded, damascus-style steel and, for the brilliant glowing effect in their Carbon Lume and Halo Glow lines, luminescent resin. The resin is a non-toxic material also used in luxury Swiss watches. It "charges" during exposure to any UV light source, and then glows when it hits the dark. Intensely for the first several minutes, with a more subtle afterglow following for an extended period thereafter. Yep, just like good sexy time.
I wonder if Outshine Designs got the idea for their Revolver Ring from Looney Tunes or one of those superhero movies where some poor sap tries to point a gun at the wrong Super Strong Man, and he takes it and bends it into itself with his bare hands.
The Revolver ring is not made from a real gun, not even The World's Smallest Pistol, but out of 14K two-tone white and yellow gold. And a lot of it apparently, because Outshine Designs says it weighs in at a hefty 50 grams of solid gold.
Manties Men's Lace Boxers
The interesting thing about this men's lingerie is that I bet it will be a 50/50 split on who's buying it as a gag gift, and who's buying it as a long-awaited addition to his wardrobe. No judgment here either way. Whatever tickles your pickle. (In this case: an 85% nylon, 15% spandex blend embroidered into a sheer rose pattern.)
686 Men's Tool Belt
The 686 Snow Tool Belt contains a built-in bottle opener on its buckle, along with Phillips and flathead screwdriver prongs, plus a wrench on its metal fastening bar. "Thus," 686 says, "eliminating the need to store a ratchet driver in your pocket." But creating the need to take your belt off and work with a large leather tail hanging from your hand every time a nice co-worker who just moved here from Alabama needs her desk drawer handle tightened.
Black Rhodium Jet Turbine Engine Cufflinks
These Jet Turbine Engine Cufflinks, made of polished black rhodium, and ready to spin real fast when you blow on them, are the perfect gift for Dads! Well, as long as you're a son with a healthy income. Or you have a dad who can lend you a couple hundos. You'll pay him back. No, you swear. This time you will.
Why settle for becoming a walking eyesore from just the waist up? Sweaters now have some competition for the World's Tackiest title, courtesy of tailored male fashion. OppoSuits are...did you figure it out?...the opposite of business suits. According to their makers, this means two things: 1) They are ridiculous; and 2) They are awesome.
Well. I'd sport one for Halloween or my next magic show anyway.
Cel Shaded Jeans
Need your video games and comic books on you at all times? Deja Neuf Heures has come up with a slightly different way to accomplish that: hand-painted cel shaded jeans.
The Traxedo - Tuxedo Track Suit
Ahhh, Traxedo. The perfect response to the next time my girlfriend tells me to put on some nice clothes and take her to the (obscenely overpriced) wine & tapas bar. Ahhh, Traxedo. The polyester penguin suit that will drape me in casual refinement, and give me instant street cred at the blackjack table in Vegas. At least until they see me play a few hands. And ahhh, Traxedo. Should there ever come a day I walk down any aisle that doesn't lead to my recliner seat in a stadium seating movie theater, I'll see you then too.
Zinvo Blade Nitro Watch
ZINVO's Blade series of watches have no interest in the secondhand. As trendsetters in timepiece design and engineering, they forgo tradition in favor of distinction, and replace the 60-second tick stick with a rotating turbine disc fitted over the Blade watch dial. Each second the entire stylized disc takes a clockwise shift.
I suppose calling theses shoes PaleoBarefoots appeals to a wider market, given the persisting eat-and-function-like-a-caveman craze popularized by the likes of CrossFit and Mark Sisson, but Chainmail Shoes sounds so much cooler. And regardless of which fancy fad followers GoSt Barefoots is catering to, the fact of the matter is that what lie before us here are pedal sheaths made of mother F'in chainmail. Hundreds of individually welded, 4.0 mm stainless steel rings worth of chainmail to be precise.
How long has it been since someone said your penis looks "dapper?" For me, the answer is an emphatic "too long." The same goes for "snazzy," "handsome," and "just like Jon Hamm." I can only hope LELO's TUX, a penis tuxedo, is here to turn all Dowdy Dicks into Dashing Richards.
A TUX isn't a mere Willy Warmer. It's a sophisticated garment, a classy piece of couture designed for all of the special events and awards (rewards?) shows your penis gets invited to.