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Wooden Tie

By: on March 07, 2014
  • Wood Tie
  • Wood Tie
  • Wood Tie
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Yes ma'am, my necktie is made of solid wood. And it just so happens it's pointing to something else that is made of solid wood, if you know what I mean. So why don't we--wait! Don't flip your hair and walk off in a huff! I was talking about my...shoes. I'm wearing wooden shoes! I am! Because I'm Dutch, from, like...Dutch...land. OK then. I guess that's one pickup line Wood Thumb's wooden tie won't add to my repertoire. At least it's easier to wipe clean when an entire glass of wine is dumped on it though.

Wooden ties are upcycled accessories, chopped, drilled, sanded, and varnished from San Francisco salvage yard redwood beams. They measure approximately 20-1/2" long. Wood Thumb notes the pictured version, a wider tie, is best sported by someone 5'11" or taller. So there goes 80% of their market. Due to having come from real trees, each tie has slight variations in texture and pattern. Just like faces. Except unlike genetics, I think Wood Thumb makes sure none of their ties turn out ugly.

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Vipukirves Leveraxe

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Honestly, the Vipukirves Leveraxe initially intrigued me because the guy holding it in one of the above photos is wearing black-and-white gloves that sort of make him look like he has a hook hand, and I thought perhaps...

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The Fusion Wallet

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Twenty-five-year-old Thomas Johnson fabricates his cool, modern industrial Fusion Wallet from 12 separate CNC-machined aluminum and hardwood components. Gee. I'm almost a decade older than Johnson and I can hardly fabricate...

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Secret Wood Rings

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Straight from a dream / snow globe / LOTR set to your finger. Secret Wood carves wearable enchantments, a line of rings topped with abstract and magical scenes of nature that look like visions inside rough-cut crystal...

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Kindling Cracker Firewood Splitter

$99.99 from Amazon »

I'm choppin' some wood, splittin' some kindlin', buildin' a fire...naw. I'm really just sitting at my keyboard eating some turkey & gravy potato chips. Yeah, I couldn't believe they were real when I saw the bag either...

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Termitat Termite Desktop Display

$125 - $150 from Termitat »

If I got a Termitat and displayed it on my desktop I guarantee you the first thing that would happen is my cat Zanzibar would figure out a way to knock it over and bust it open and let a bunch of Dampwood Termites loose...

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US State 3D Wood Topographic Maps

$75 - $125 from Etsy »

And if you go with Florida, you can use your 3D Wood Topographic Map as a perfectly level cutting board! Haha, Florida's flatter than piss on a plate. I've always wanted to ride a Schwinn 10 Speed top-to-bottom through...

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Granberg Chainsaw Mill

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If someone twisted my arm put me into a Half Nelson and demanded I select some form of manual labor as my Sunday Funday activity, Granberg's Chainsaw Mill would be my first choice....

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Titanium & Jack Daniels Barrel Ring

$245 - $345 from Etsy »

I guess I've been in a serious relationship with Jack Daniels for long enough now that I'm willing to don his ring and announce it to the world. Especially a ring as slick as this one. Check out the genuine used JD white...

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Zebra Electric Wooden Boat

It's seafaring time. The Zebra Boat from designer Dimitri Bez motors through the water with the elegance of a Chris-Craft, but its criss-crossing slats of solid wood laid on the bias create what is, to me, an even more...

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Mechanical Wooden Clock Kit

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I was going to get my 14-year-old nephew one of these Mechanical Wooden Clock Kits for Christmas, but then I remembered they don't teach kids how to tell analog time anymore so he wouldn't even be able to read it. I also...

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ALFI Wood-Burning Hot Tub

$2,999 - $3,890 from Amazon »

Not only does ALFI's Fire Hot Tub look like a slice of a cartoon spaceship, but its "engine" is a wood-burning fire pit. No electricity, generators, plugs, or drain connections required....

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Stikwood - Peel & Stick Wood Decor

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Stikwood happens when real wood from the likes of oak and maple trees meets, say, duct tape with an infallible 10-year adhesive lifespan. As 1/8" thick panels with peel & stick strip backings, Stikwood installations fit...