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xHamster fifi - Sex Toy For Men (NSFW)

By: on April 07, 2017
  • xHamster fifi - Sex Toy For Men (NSFW)
  • xHamster fifi - Sex Toy For Men (NSFW)
  • xHamster fifi - Sex Toy For Men (NSFW)
  • xHamster fifi - Sex Toy For Men (NSFW)
$29.95
from
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Have you met fifi? Rubbed elbows one off with the discreet, no-mess male masturbator yet? If not, here's your chance to slip in on the action with fifi's new xHamster edition.

Yes, I said xHamster. Both Richard Gere and the National Rodent Association of the United States request you spare them the jokes.

This lavish new edition of the fifi includes the lovable xHamster logo and a textured interior. Each xHamster fifi comes in a collector's box with gold foil accents and 5 of fifi's signature disposable sleeves. Read more about the fifi experience (and watch the video!) and buy an xHamster, or any other style in the company's line of male masturbators, exclusively at getfifi.com.

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Vibrating Panties (NSFW)

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New life hack, ladies: vibrating panties for your long, miserable commute. Vibrating panties for your long, miserable shift. Vibrating panties for your long, miserable night of caring for your poor little monkey with...

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Boregasm Pills

Good thing yawns and O faces look about the same because, thanks to research being conducted by a handful of (presumably exhausted and horny) PhD students at Indiana University's The Kinsey Institute, they're about to...

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Flowering Penis Coffee Mug

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For all the ladies (and fellas!) who count floral patterns and penises amongst their favorite things, have I got a mug of a gift for you. Clothing and accessory brand HUMAN goes for a very anatomical part of being one...

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Wobbling Willy - Your Face on a Dildo (NSFW)

Dudes, check out the Wobbling Willy's practical application for all those selfies you've been taking. Your face on a dildo. A way, way sexier (and more functional!) gift for your girlfriend than that framed dick pic you...

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Japanese Electric Piston Masturbator (NSFW)

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Note: The Japanese electric piston masturbator's NSFW designation serves not so much as a reminder that this device is not suitable to view at work as it does a reminder that it is not suitable to use at work. I found...

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LaunchPAD - Fleshlight iPad Case (NSFW)

$29.95 from Fleshlight »

Though it's not electric or piston-powered...or Japanese...like this friendly sex toy, the LaunchPAD does employ advanced technology in a valiant effort to enhance Man's alone time. The makers of male masturbatory aid...

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Embarrassing Box Prank Mailer (NSFW)

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D*ck in a Box is back! Just in time to dil-dole out some good times at the office and an April Fool's Day gift or two. Like many popular send-it-anonymously pranks, maker Witty Yeti will take a sworn oath to mail your...

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Selfie Vibrator with HD Camera (NSFW)

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It doesn't have to be a holiday or special occasion to surprise your lady with a thoughtful gift. The Svakom Gaga Sex Selfie Stick even has a foolproof, built-in mechanism for gauging how much she likes it. Come on, sugar...

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Images You Should Not Masturbate To

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If you're wondering if its title is true, feed your curiosities with the photo of the dog that looks like George Costanza's mom in this book of Images You Should Not Masturbate To. And I thought the salt shaker was bad....

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How to Pee with Morning Wood

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A self-help guide to dealing with the enormous issue I face first thing in the morning every single day of my life and it's packaged as whimsical wall art that will add immeasurable character to my bathroom? How to Pee...

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Private Gym Penis Trainer (NSFW)

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It's the one body part P90X neglects. But before you reach for a Viagra to long-and-strongify your johnson, the Private Gym would like its shot at ripping your penis to shr-...uh.... Maybe I'll go with a different idiomatic...

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Paco's Taco Stroker

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At first I was like, Who the h-e-double-boner named this kitchen tool "Paco's Taco Stroker?" I'm going to make so many masturbation jokes when I write about it. And then I looked closer and was like, Holy hard-on! They...