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Wednesday, November 28, 2012
World's Tackiest Sweaters

Flagrant foul. No words can describe these hideously tacky sweaters. Well, that's not quite true. These words can describe them: Skittles; cheeseburger; condoms; french fries; gummy worms; popcorn; palm trees; wafts of smoke; nebula.... more...

Thursday, August 02, 2012
RPG-7 Bottle Launcher

Why is it that the toys you or I make with our buddies from scrap lengths of pipe and sheet metal the year we take high school physics always end up as legitimate, purchasable commodities developed and manufactured by the Japanese? more...

Saturday, June 23, 2012
Kinkajou Bottle Cutter
$50 from The Kinkajou »

GIVEAWAY ALERT! We are giving away Kinkajou Bottle Cutters to 5 lucky Dude readers! And unlike going to the airport, entry is quick and hassle-free. Sign up by May 7, 2013 using the form below. more...

Saturday, November 03, 2012
Zero Day Bed
By: Fanstudio

"Simplicity is resolved complexity." So says architect, designer, sculptor, and creator of the Zero Day Bed, Jorge Goval. The indoor-outdoor lounger and sleeper subscribes to nature's tropism phenomenon--the adaptive movements plants more...

Sunday, December 23, 2012
Titanium Lock Picking Card
$49.99 from ITS Tactical »

Not that I'm one to break and enter, but...I could be if I had ITS Tactical's Titanium Entry Card. Made of aircraft grade titanium, the 0.032" thick "emergency" lock pick tool set fits just as easily into wallets as it does into single-pin more...

Wednesday, March 06, 2013
Stormtrooper Latex
$175 - $795 from Etsy »

Latex Star Wars Stormtrooper attire comes in a variety of cuts and styles so that all body types can find one that's suitable and flattering. And if you buy that I've also got an instant, no-fail national economic recovery plan to sell you. more...

Sunday, January 15, 2012
Liquipel - Waterproof Your iPhone
$59 from Liquipel »

As phones get smaller and smaller and cases for these tiny phones get bigger and bigger, we still have one threat to our precious 21st century life support. And that threat is water. H2O. The deadliest substance known to technology. more...

Wednesday, December 28, 2011
Skirt Length Sluttiness Stockings

While these may not be the definitive measurement for exactly how a lady is feeling, they're certainly guaranteed to provoke some interesting conversation. From "demure" to "dangerous" the Leg's Talk stockings provide a handy indicator more...

Saturday, December 01, 2012
Prank Pack Fake Gift Boxes
$7.99 from Amazon »

Liven up the holidays--at least for yourself--with Prank Packs, fake gift boxes with intricately detailed photos and explanations of products just bizarre enough to be ridiculous, but just believable enough in enterprising 21st century more...

Sunday, February 17, 2013
LumaTank - Edge Lit Fish Tank
$50 - $100 from Kickstarter »

Betta fish have all the luck. They enjoy a completely acceptable sedentary lifestyle of floating and feeding, they never have to share their personal space with other fish, and now, thanks to Rob Young and Denny Curtis of Red Laser more...

If bat shit looked like 1000mW of ice-blue lightning, the S3 Spyder III Arctic Laser would be the physical manifestation of bat shit crazy. As it stands, the world's most powerful laser is just fuckin' nuts. Wicked Lasers' (absolutely, 100% legal) handheld bolt of pure spectral power counts amongst its marketable skills the ability to: Sear through ornery plastic, pop bitch-ass balloons, burn continuously, 24/7, without sustaining damage to its laser diode, function in 9 different operating modes, including Strobe, Constant Wave, SOS, Beacon, and Tactical Hibernation, emit 0.25 Lux of light at a distance of 6,856 meters, turn anyone it hits in the eye at a distance of 149 meters or less into Ray Charles, minus the musical talent and soul.

And if that weren't enough to get it laid every day for the duration of its 5,000+-hour serviceable life, Guinness is currently testing the S3 Arctic for the official title of World's Most Powerful Laser.

The S3 Arctic Series Laser resides in an aircraft grade aluminum chassis that's smaller than a standard flashlight.

Wednesday, March 06, 2013
Thorn Dice
$27.20 - $85 from Shapeways »

Pain, blood, Thorn Dice: you gotta pay to play. Meandering threads of contemporary CAD technology intertwine to form polyhedral dice bodies dotted with protruding thorns and varying numerical sequences that accommodate all pursuits more...

Sunday, March 03, 2013
The Pedal Pub
$40,000 from Hammacher Schlemmer »

One time I participated in a Pedal Pub Crawl. Yeah, I know the beer bar on training wheels looks more suitable for middle-aged tourists who own a designated pair of "walking shoes" than a strapping stud like me, but I do admire its more...

Wednesday, July 18, 2012
Dude Wipes
$12.99 from Amazon »

Dude Wipes: A Brief Overview of Audience and Application. Dude Wipes are for dudes. And every once in while--say, every 18 to 24 hours--dudes tend to have an especially...explosive...encounter with the bathroom. The kind of rectal projectile more...

Friday, April 05, 2013
Mario Industrial Pipe Lamp
$199.35 from Etsy »

The lamp is a 1" black iron pipe and its fixture is a vintage recycled glass insulator and the Mario hovering above the decorative green pipe is the light pull! Sweeeeet! Mama! I need to borrow 199 dollars. And 35 cents. No, I swear more...

Tuesday, January 01, 2013
Mario Piranha Plant Glass Pipe
$84.95 from Etsy »

If you "fertilize" it properly and approach it from the right end, not only will the Piranha Plant not kill you, it will actually ease any pain you may have, and make you feel blissfully content. Though also maybe hungry enough to eat more...

Tuesday, May 07, 2013
LiddUp Illuminated Cooler
$79 - $100 from Kickstarter »

The LiddUp cooler's interior LED lining caters to bonfires, backyard BBQs, campsites, and anywhere else high on the drinking but low on the lighting levels normally present to assist partiers in determining what exactly they're sucking more...

Saturday, February 16, 2013
Chameleon Lounger
$5,500 from Opulent Items »

Check out the Optimus Prime of seating designs. Though slightly less cool than the balls lounger, Francesca Donati's chameleon lounger still looks way more comfortable and relaxing than my hangover. Whoa, non sequitur. Why is it though more...

Monday, April 22, 2013
High Resolution Ear Scope

Don't try to pretend like you don't want a 5x magnified, 13,000 pixel view of your earwax. The EarScope delivers a nearly perfect image of the Q-Tip zone to assist with cleaning or taking sick pleasure in watching a mountain of wax more...

Monday, December 10, 2012
Military Grade USB Drive
$125 - $179 from Amazon »

A less expensive alternative to the Crypteks USB Drive, the Apricorn Aegis Secure Key Flash Drive boasts military grade full-disk AES 256-bit CBC hardware encryption, further protected by a 7- to 15-digit PIN-activated alphanumeric more...

Tuesday, May 14, 2013
Star Wars Cats Pincushions
$22 - $23 from Etsy »

One thing I really do not like is cats. Which makes them the perfect subject for a pincushion. Their Star Wars spin trips me up a little--it's going to be way less gratifying to stab a Han Solo cat in the gut than it would be just to more...

Wednesday, January 23, 2013
Dapper Celebrity Soldier Prints
$24.95 - $55.95 from Society 6 »

Obviously the only one of these celebrities who really sat for his French Republican Guard...or whatever...portrait in the 19th century is Chuck Norris because he's immortal and easily over 200 years old. The rest are fakes, Photoshopped--or more...

Saturday, March 17, 2012
blk. - Black Bottled Water
$55 from Amazon »

We wondered too, but the answer is no. blk. black bottled water is not part of an SNL skit à la black caulk or Colon Blow. It's a real artesian spring water from aquifers in Canada's Sandiland Forest Reserve. And it takes itself very more...

Sunday, April 22, 2012
Laser Gloves

Dudes, watch the whole video. Or at least fast forward to the final 20 seconds to behold the reasons why your life will not reach its full potential until it can count Laser Gloves as part of it. The match-igniting, balloon-popping, more...

Sunday, March 10, 2013
The $30,000 Lamborghini Bicycle
$32,505 from BMC Switzerland »

The 50th Anniversary Lamborghini Edition impec is the bike P. Diddy or Kanye West would buy if they took up cycling. Which is to say if they learned to ride a bicycle. Oh the comedy that would ensue the first time Puffy or World's Largest more...

Sunday, April 07, 2013
Magnetic Field Candlesticks

From forth the brilliant Magneto mind of Dutch designer Jolan van der Wiel comes another player in his Gravity series of magnetic field creations. Candlestick formation employs the same machine van der Wiel built to create his jagged, more...

Friday, July 27, 2012
The World's Strongest Coffee
$19.99 from Amazon »

Great. Something to make the guy in the cube next to me even more hyperactive and annoying. I wonder how fast he'll be able to recite all the state capitols after chugging 32 ounces of the world's strongest coffee. Death Wish was created more...

Thursday, October 11, 2012
Self Defense Shoelace Inserts
$11.06 from Amazon »

Fury's Tactical Kuba-Kickz is a lightweight plastic, spiked insert that fits between the weave of shoelaces and serves as a--how do you say?--balls-on accurate, devastatingly effective, though non-lethal self defense tool. This seems more...

Thursday, January 05, 2012
Fish Aquarium Sink
$4,500 from Opulent Items »

Moving goldfish out of the living room and into the bathroom for a perfect view of what will surely be their place of final burial, down the toilet, seems like an illogical move. That is, until you see this awesome fish aquarium sink. more...

Wednesday, March 20, 2013
CubeSensors
$249 - $349 from Cube Sensors »

One of the main things about CubeSensors is that they are unobtrusive and not hideously ugly. So when you're geeking out using them to tell you how indoor temperatures and air quality are affecting your sleep, or when you're making more...

Thursday, May 09, 2013
Crispy Crust Pizza Maker
$149.95 from Williams Sonoma »

Williams Sonoma predicts Breville's compact countertop crispy crust pizza maker will change my life. Now, far be it from me to argue with the world's #1 kitchen store magnate about life-altering experiences, but given that I can get more...