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Darth Vader ToothSaber Toothpick Dispenser

$60.50 from Amazon »

From oral hygiene to hors d'oeuvres serving, the Dark Lord of the Sith has your back. Exhibiting an unrelenting desire to serve and protect, Darth Vader has traded in his lightsaber for a toothpick. A wad of toothpicks...

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BetterBack Posture Corrector

$59 from Amazon »

BetterBack has gotten a lot of support in its efforts to do the same for you. From Kickstarter to IndieGoGo crowdfunding, to Shark Tank and Lori Greiner investment funding, this posture corrector looks a little ridiculous...

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Seinfeldia

$14.63 from Amazon »

Now you have two options for giving the Gift of Nothing. This one in a box, and this one in a book. Seinfeldia: How a Show About Nothing Changed Everything tells the story of what some say is the best, and others the...

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fifi Discreet Male Masturbator (NSFW)

$24.95 - $29.95 from fifi »

Often when you're traveling, when you're home alone, or when you're sharing the bed with someone who drank 5 lychee martinis and passed out early, nature calls. A different kind of nature. A stiff kind of nature. The...

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The Kashtray

$18.95 from Amazon »

The makers of this pipe smoker's ashtray say it was "inspired by necessity and enhanced through design." The inspiring mother they speak of is a pipe, used, cleaned, and ready for a refill. The invention she bore: the...

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Mini Emergency Gear Cutter & Knife

Sold Out from Amazon »

While still pretty small and light, this gear cutter and knife looks to me like a Hulked out version of Gerber's Zip Blade. A little bulkier. A little rougher around the edges. A few more teeth. And probably better equipped...

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Breed Socrates Watch

$74.99 from Breed »

Socrates said, "Know thyself." Do you know thyself? And does thyself need a new watch? How about a casual, sporty one with luminous hands and 10 ATM water resistance? One named after a certain Greek philosopher who also...

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Pillo Home Health Robot

$349 - $499 from Pillo Health »

Pillo. In a way it's like a head support to help the health-obsessed and hypochondriacs rest easy. More literally, Pillo is a desktop robot for the home you can task with managing and complementing your wellness. Pillo...

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Tarus 2x2 ATV

According to its Russian designers, the Tarus 2x2 is an ATV made to "overcome bezdorozhya." I don't know exactly what "bezdorozhya" is--it stumped my Google translator--but if the Tarus promo video is any indication...

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Recycled Skateboard Butcher Knives

Sold Out from Etsy »

Trick out your kitchen with a 2nd Shot Canada skateboard butcher knife. Husband and wife team Lindsay and John turn ollies, tailslides, and top guns into the handles of their damascus chopping blades. Each is a OOAK knife...

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A Super Upsetting Cookbook About Sandwiches

$15.63 from Amazon »

A Super Upsetting Cookbook About Sandwiches is kind of like PornBurger meets a neurotic New York chef. Tyler Kord owns and operates NYC's No. 7 restaurant and No. 7 Sub shops. His sandwiches look delicious. His mind looks...

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Beastgrip Smartphone Camera Rig

$139.99 from Amazon »

If the grip is as beastly as the look of this smartphone camera rig, I think we've got a chicken dinner on the table tonight. The Beastgrip Pro is a universal lens adapter and rig system for your phone intended to give...

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Banana Flour

$13.49 from Amazon »

Paleo and gluten-free monkeys rejoice! You can now enjoy puffy, fluffy pancakes, peanut butter cookies, and rich, thick sausage gravy, or even just an extra shot of potassium in your morning smoothie, courtesy of the...

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PF Flyers Made in USA Sandlot Edition

$149.99 from PF Flyers »

I'm pretty sure PF Flyers released an official pair of Sandlot Center Hi's a few years ago to commemorate the 20th anniversary of Benny's hopping over that fence to pickle The Beast. But now they have another batch, the...

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ONAK Foldable Canoe

$1,335 - $1,450 from ONAK Canoes »

I've now seen--in the spirit of Sesame Street's The Count--one! One origami boat! Two! Two packable personal water gliders! Three! Three foldable floaters! A-ha-ha-ha-ha! Following a lead set in 2012 with the Oru Kayak...

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The Espire Gas Mask

Carlos Schreib created the Espire respirator for professional varnishers and chemical engineers who don't want to work with a heavy filter over their mouth or walk around the office looking like an evil steampunk doktor....

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Suicide Squad: Behind the Scenes

$27.99 from Amazon »

Wait, there's a movie about DC Comics villains coming out?! With Harley Quinn and The Joker?! I hadn't heard. They must not be promoting it very hard....

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Blendtec Classic 570 Blender

$249.99 from Blendtec »

While many of you enjoy trading in phones, cars, and girlfriends for newer, better models, a blender is the kind of acquisition you'd probably rather not repeat every year or few. And particularly not when it's 95 degrees...

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Tactical Self Defense Flashlight

$18.99 from Amazon »

This flashlight has a super bright Cree XM-L T6 bulb so you can see...where you're jabbing its 4 diamond attack heads. They say the pointy pokers are ideal for breaking a window during a home or car emergency, but I'm...

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The Nuggy - Smoker's Multi-Tool

$33 from NugTools, LLC »

Whoa, Nuggy! I'munna put you in a headlock and give you a Nuggy! Is that a Nuggy in your Snuggy or are you just...wearing a Snuggy in July without even being high? Nuggy, Nuggy, Nuggy. The only thing better than the word...

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Ammo Can Knife Set

First the ammo, then the fire. On the range, and now in the kitchen, courtesy of Delta Echo Products' Ammo Can Knife set. Arm yourself with the tools you'll need to cube, trim, slice, and dice your ingredients into shape...

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Tanita Ironman Body Composition Scale

$239.99 from Amazon »

Even though the Tanita Ironman gets down and dirty with its data, it's possible this is one scale whose numbers could actually make you feel better about your weight. Rather than just flashing out measurements of mass...

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Salt & Pepper Rocket Mill

$66.53 from Amazon »

Would you like some freshly blasted pepper on your salad? A little salt to take your soup from tasty to out of this world?...

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Ladybird How-To Books for Grown-Ups

$0.78 - $3.07 from Amazon »

1960s pictures, 2010s nuggets of wisdom. The London-based Laybirds launched in 1964 as a series of hardback books presenting stereotypes of Brits and their family life. They were intended to help kids learn to read. And...

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Titan Virtually Indestructible Charging Cables

$11.95 - $22.49 from Fuse Chicken »

Tangle-proof, virtually indestructible, and kind of fun for idle hands to dink around with, Fuse Chicken's Titan replaces the limp, damage-prone plastic cords you've been using to charge your iPhone. These MFi-certified...

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SOUP3RB Cook + Blend Blender

$86.21 from Amazon »

It looks like someone stuck the SOUP3RB's name in a blender. I'll leave it up to you to decide whether the word that came out of 3 Square's Cook + Blend machine is hot or cold....

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Caliber Ballistic Barware

First there was the Muzzleshot, a reimagination of the M16 rifle's A2 flash hider as a 1-1/2-ounce glass for shooting booze, not bullets, making lushes, not war. Then the Muzzleshot morphed into the 5.56 Shot, a rebranding...

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Cooking for Two: Your Cat & You!

$11.34 from Amazon »

Uh...I guess this is for after your girlfriend shares a glass of a wine and a heart-to-heart with Mr. Winkles, and they're both a little hungry and a little tipsy and wouldn't it be great just to stay in and watch Sex...

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Surviv-All Outdoor Knife

$32.99 from StatGear »

Dude's Word of the Day: Surviv-All. The action-packed knife is also a Deal of the Day at 26% off retail value....

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LectroFan White Noise Machine

$49.95 from Amazon »

Sleep should be simple. Get tired, lie down, close your eyes, enter Sandman. And maybe it would be if it weren't for that barking dog. The constant sirens. The voices outside. Or, worse, the total, eerie silence. Just...

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Tiny Arcade Machines

$59.95 from Amazon »

Tiny Arcade retro cabinets aren't just small enough to play from your desktop, they're small enough to play from the palm of your hand. If you have tiny hands. And the delicate, dextrous fingers of a child prodigy harpist....

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Prank Star Poo Dough

$5.63 from Amazon »

It's even more gratifying when you make it yourself! Poo Dough is an easy DIY prank that looks and, depending on what one might have eaten last night, feels almost exactly like the real thing! Spray some patchouli on...

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LapDome Device Sun Shade & Carrying Case

$89.99 from Amazon »

A shield of shade and a shield of privacy alike, the LapDome covers your laptop, tablet, or phone for uninterrupted outdoor and public use. And through July 31, 2016, you can get one from Amazon for 21% off using the...

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Geeky Sex Toys (NSFW)

$25 - $199 from Etsy »

Now that Pokemon have made you Go, Geeky Sex Toys thinks it's time you catch some that will make you Come. Yep, the enterprising Australian adult shop went there, and now has a (limited edition) set of Pokemoan dildos...

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The Chork - Chopsticks & Fork in One

$8.99 - $14.99 from Amazon »

What you see before you are cheaters. At least cheaters in the Chork-o-Sphere. The Chork is a double-ended fork (flip!) and chopsticks combo. Use it tines-down and you're eating like a Westerner. Split the utensil in...

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Nike Shoebox Safe

Swoosh your stash so sticky fingers won't swipe it. Except...bummer. The Mandem Safe, a keyed crypt for your valuables that looks like a Nike shoebox, is still just a prototype. So even harder to get right now than a...

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Kyle's Kinetics Handmade Balancing Sculptures

$49.99 - $299 from Kyle's Kinetics »

Is your life out of balance? Could you use some inspiration? Are you just sick of Carson in the desk next door getting all the stop-bys and giggles from the ladies because he has the cool desktop toys? Kyle and his Kinetics...

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Black & Decker Matrix 6-Tool Combo Kit

$174.20 from Amazon »

Black & Decker's Matrix Quick Connect System is a multi-tool for dudes who don't mess around. This is no nail file-bottle-opener-mini-scissor-flashlight combo you can slip into your pocket. This is a Suitcase of Power...

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Moscai Cocktail

$23.99 from Moscai »

Moscai: Made for a woman, but strong enough for a man...to steal a few sips when no one's looking because despite sounding like the new Zima for ladies and lightweights, it actually tastes pretty good. A vodka-based cocktail...

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iRestore Laser Hair Growth System

$695 from Amazon »

I'm not saying the iRestore laser hair growth system works. (I'm also not saying I need a need an iRestore laser hair growth system. For the record.) But the helmet with the red glow and hefty price tag does claim to...

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Satan's Blood Hot Sauce

$13.89 from Amazon »

Satan's Blood Hot Sauce comes in a "blood vial shaped bottle with 800,000 Scoville units of pepper extract." Yeah, I can see that. I can also see a cock & balls ready to spew a scorching, blinding, fiery-hot death onto...

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Underhill Home - Luxury Hobbit-Hole

$917k from rightmove »

Now that the British Pound has taken its first real hit in recent memory, you might start thinking about buying up some real estate in England. This 4-bedroom, 4,000-square-foot home called Underhill is a steal at $917,000....

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North Sense Human Compass Implant

$350 from Cyborg Nest »

I've wished I were a human bulldozer. A human airplane. A human beatbox. But a human compass? Never crossed my mind before North Sense....

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Lodge Seasoned Steel Grill Pan

$36.87 from Amazon »

The one thing that sucks about meat and veggie kebabs is...kebabbing the meat and veggies. They're a B to thread, a B to keep on the skewers, a B to flip, and then a B to get back off after the heat congeals the chicken...

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Star Wars Death Star Toaster

$65.54 from The Fowndry »

This Death Star is armed with 7,293 TIE Fighters, and it's ready to deploy them onto your sliced bread. In toaster form, it's also the perfect solution to mornings you're in a rush and don't have time to craft a complete...

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Dual Action Beard Comb & Protective Sleeve

$20.95 from Amazon »

Dual. Action. Teeth. Bad for manscaping (and other below-the-belt activities), good for beard grooming. And as wedding season hits full swing and hipster facial hair a 21st century high, Huntsman Beard's Dual Action Beard...

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Grafton Pen

$28.99 from Everyman »

The Grafton is a pen from Everyman. And it's an everyman pen. Engineered, but not overly so, stylish but not flashy. It's machined from sturdy anodized aluminum and has a heavy-duty bolt-on clip for latching it to pockets...

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The PistachiOpener

$28.98 from Amazon »

Munching on pistachios is my jam. Cracking open the shells, watching them pile up into a mountain of accomplished noshing. It's a fine way to spend a Saturday afternoon. But doing it can really leave an impression. A...