A Geek's Gift Guide of Gadgets, Gear and Novelties    * Updated daily

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Thursday, September 12, 2013
$13 from Amazon »

Heavy Doody cannot hide the fact that I washed down 3 bowls of Honey Badger BBQ chili with one of those German hefeweizens that tastes like bananas, or that I've been in the bathroom for 18 minutes, or the sounds I am making...

Thursday, June 21, 2012

Here's another idea that could have been mine if I had better ideas: laser-engraved business cards with USB drives. For storing resumes and cover letters. Portfolios of design work, writing, and music. Company sales pitches...

Monday, October 15, 2012
Discontinued

Much like the AdrenaSuit Socrates Everlasting Socks, or SocSocks, employ a military grade Kevlar|Carbon Matrix that will render you impenetrable. OK fine, it will just render the socks impenetrable. But still, a pair of foot koozies guaranteed never to get a hole, droop, or wear out on the bottom is pretty damn cool. And thanks to Cam Carter, they're not an April Fool's joke....

Saturday, May 19, 2012
$0.99 from iOSnoops »

A while back, Stephen Lippens started thinking that someone should make the old Flash game Pandemic for the iPhone. And then, despite having virtually no technical background or experience, he figured that someone may as well...

Friday, December 7, 2012
$39.95 from Homemade Gin »

Mommy, where does gin come from? Vodka, Bobby. Gin comes from vodka. At least if it's homemade. Shunning expensive, and possibly illegal, distilling equipment, the Homemade Gin Kit allows those who possess it to create intoxicatingly...

Sunday, September 4, 2011
$76.24 from Amazon »

Great tool for taking your mindless "on the telephone" doodles and converting them to digital masterpieces. Designed for rough concepting and creative brainstorming, Inkling is ideal for the front end of the creative process. Checkout the video!...

Tuesday, July 30, 2013
$19 - $30 from Society 6 »

Kids, this is what happens when you don't wear sunscreen: everyone figures out your secret identity. See Mike Draw has created a Superhero Tan Lines print to show how even the likes of Batman can be so clever when it comes...

Wednesday, February 27, 2013
$15 - $38 from Etsy »

Likelihood I would kill a pet jellyfish: 100%. Likelihood I would kill a potted plant: 98%. Likelihood I would kill a jellyfish air plant: 75%. Because Etsy shop Petit Beast swears on its spiky sea urchin shells that caring...

Monday, November 5, 2012
$249.99 from Gizmine »

With this In-Home Fireworks Theater, you can now say, "Happy New Year!", "Happy Birthday, America!", and "Happy Sweet 16, spoiled brat with a rich daddy!" 365 days a year. From the comfort of your own living room, no less....

Tuesday, May 21, 2013
$15 from Amazon »

Father's Day is June 16th. I don't know about you, but I sure can't think of a better gift for a new dad than an apparatus that will allow him to suck the snot out of his kid's nose with his own mouth. And who says you have...

If bat shit looked like 1000mW of ice-blue lightning, the S3 Spyder III Arctic Laser would be the physical manifestation of bat shit crazy. As it stands, the world's most powerful laser is just fuckin' nuts. Wicked Lasers' (absolutely, 100% legal) handheld bolt of pure spectral power counts amongst its marketable skills the ability to: Sear through ornery plastic, pop bitch-ass balloons, burn continuously, 24/7, without sustaining damage to its laser diode, function in 9 different operating modes, including Strobe, Constant Wave, SOS, Beacon, and Tactical Hibernation, emit 0.25 Lux of light at a distance of 6,856 meters, turn anyone it hits in the eye at a distance of 149 meters or less into Ray Charles, minus the musical talent and soul.

And if that weren't enough to get it laid every day for the duration of its 5,000+-hour serviceable life, Guinness is currently testing the S3 Arctic for the official title of World's Most Powerful Laser.

The S3 Arctic Series Laser resides in an aircraft grade aluminum chassis that's smaller than a standard flashlight.

Monday, March 25, 2013
$21.99 from Etsy »

Ryan McArthur has compiled a graphical study of the Top 100 Zombie films in order of how much they pale in comparison to Zombieland and, for that matter, any movie in which Bill Murray has ever appeared, including that Rushmore...

Wednesday, October 17, 2012
By: WIZDISH

The WizDish is on a quest to make virtual reality and first-person gaming even more active and interactive without incurring costs prohibitive to 98% of the people who enjoy virtual reality and first-person gaming. The locomotion...

Tuesday, February 5, 2013
$40 from Etsy »

Cloud Strife needs some help wielding his massive Buster Sword and Zack seems to be busy at the moment. Want to wear it around your neck? Chainmail mastro Michelle has hand woven a 23" gunmetal chain to support its hefty length...

Thursday, September 5, 2013
$39.99 from Vat 19 »

This is what happens to people who eat 5-pound gummy bears: they OD on sugar and high fructose corn syrup, their brains become gelatinous, and they turn into 5-pound gummy skulls. In flavors cherry, blue raspberry, and grape....

Thursday, May 2, 2013
$79 from Amazon »

John Boos designed the corner cutting board/counter space saver from solid maple and recommends that you add it to your "kitchen arsenal". Please raise your hand if you have a kitchen arsenal. Please raise your hand if you...

Saturday, February 23, 2013
$19.32 from Amazon »

I know this horse head mask is meant to be grossly unsettling to the viewer, but when I look at it all I can think of is Kramer Tourette's-ing out "Gggiiiddy up" and I feel more amused than disturbed. I imagine the expression...

Tuesday, October 30, 2012
By: Behance

The latest in shoebox living, Buse Ustun of Ankara, Turkey created VIA particularly for young adult couples cohabitating in tiny apartments with limited kitchen space. The compact, modular cooker incorporates all major kitchen...

Saturday, December 21, 2013
$14.95 from Amazon »

Aw, little hummingbird charms to perch atop my wine glass and demarcate which syrah has my backwash in it. How precious and handy. A service to all. And unlike ringed glass ID tags, the hummingbirds can act as markers for...

Monday, August 27, 2012
$15.66 from My eFox »

Everyone will be glad to know this Blood Pool Pillow comes with a 1-year warranty. Like, in case it evaporates or absorbs into the bedsheets or something, I guess. The deep red velvet casing is stuffed to a 3D level of equal...

Tuesday, November 22, 2011
$169.99 from Infmetry »

It's the relationship and commitment hairshirt! Currently available in "Always" and "Marry me", Inner Message Rings are the perfect way to say, "If you really love me, you'll wear this ring that never stops gouging your flesh...

Wednesday, April 25, 2012
Sold Out from Etsy »

The Goliathon is a formidable gun of the steampunk persuasion. An apocalyptic machination of copper, brass, and steel that harnesses the power of a full-size steam locomotive. A mammoth burly enough to annihilate an army of...

Wednesday, March 20, 2013
$129.95 - $199.95 from Hammacher Schlemmer »

It's a Back of the Door Cabinet. Seven words, and my work is done....

Saturday, November 9, 2013
$197.92 from Amazon »

Problem 1: Finding a surface area of my mama's house large enough to accommodate a puzzle whose assembled size measures 214" x 75.5", or about 17' x 6'. Problem 2 (and Problem Much Bigger): Uh, putting the brain-and-eye-fryer...

Monday, March 26, 2012
$195 from Etsy »

According to the Handbook for the Recently Deceased, the Beetlejuice Terrarium is an accurately-depicted scale model of the Maitland-Deetz estate, replete with fence posts, dirt driveway, the foreboding, Burton-esque tree...

Monday, February 13, 2012
$199 from DNA 11 »

If you're a Double Helix Fan Club member, but can't make it to Japan to clone your face, and find the prospect of being mug-melded with your sister a little disturbing, check out this subtler artistic representation of your...

Sunday, March 25, 2012
$34.99 from Battleshots »

Ah, it appears a version of Battleship has been invented for the kids who actually leave their dorm rooms on Friday nights. Battle Shots, in a hilarious act of futility, purports to combine analytical thinking and strategic...

Thursday, February 7, 2013
$16.95 from Amazon »

My first question when Tim Joyce wrote to me about his Dry Goods athletic powder was, "Uh, what's that?" To which he responded, "It's essentially sprayable Gold Bond without the mess." Cool. But of course my second question...

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Thursday, November 28, 2013
$10.99 from Amazon »

I imagine this Rabbit electrical cocktail shaker contains the same motor as the Rabbit electric ladies' vibrator, which must mean it is strong, powerful, and effective, yet gentle and sensitive to the needs of its user. A...

Friday, August 26, 2011

Mmmm... Delicious banana flavored scorpion vodka. I've been dying for some of this stuff. Equally as refreshing after a long run as when you wake up in a shallow dirt grave across the Mexican border. Nothing takes the sting...

Tuesday, June 4, 2013
$10.11 from Amazon »

Even though my distaste for cats is such that I kind of wish someone would lock all of them in a bell tower scheduled to be lit on fire, I've read a few of the entries from this I Could Pee on This: And Other Poems by Cats...

Wednesday, February 20, 2013
$10.93 from Amazon »

Good thing they didn't let me name this portable, credit-card-sized razor and mirror combo. I would have picked something stupid like Carzor. You know, credit card + razor = Carzor. Like how Brad + Angelina = ...oh wait, what...

Wednesday, December 12, 2012
$399 - $1,300 from Drive a Tank »

Tank camp? Oh boy, I've been looking for an excuse to go to Kasota, Minnesota! The Drive a Tank family owns and operates this adrenaline-jacking experience 90 minutes outside of Minneapolis, during which participants can not...

Monday, July 30, 2012
$239.95 from Etsy »

Pastiche of 1960s artistic minimalism and Cold War technology, anyone? The Six Digit Nixie Tube Clock combines original Russian New Old Stock IN-14 Nixie tubes with 16 user-controlled colors of LED lighting, and the hands...

Wednesday, October 10, 2012
$39.90 from dbeauty shop »

Batman. He's conquered the comics. He's conquered the big screen. He's conquered Lycra and plastic composites armor. Now, he's here to take on eyeballs. Batman Contact Lenses make their wearers one with the Dark Knight's optics...

Wednesday, July 3, 2013
$1,462.28 from Amazon »

One time my friend Esteban bought a boat and named it Anubis and that's about the only exposure I've ever had to the Egyptian jackal-headed god of the underworld. But I guess if I'm lucky when I die he and his six-pack will...

Thursday, October 11, 2012
$425 from Etsy »

I'm imagining how much toxic air I could intake, and how many zombies I could Sucker Punch in this kick ass leather and aluminum Defender Gas Mask. Pretty sure the total is zero, but I'm going to look so damn cool getting...

Thursday, November 14, 2013
$129 from CB2 »

I'll be gnome for Christmas. You can count on me. Please have snow and di-i-sco, and heavy techno beats. Ahh, even better than a zombie or Scarface gnome to station in my garden is a mirror ball gnome to hang from my ceiling....

Sunday, April 22, 2012

No matter the context, the topic of head always seems to be a controversial one. Does it enhance the experience or cheapen it? How much is too much? Do you let others know when they get a little bit stuck to their face? The...

Tuesday, July 17, 2012
$387k from Lamborghini »

When the Dark Knight rises he'll be chillin' in carbon fiber, revving a 700 HP V12 engine, and surging from 0 to 62 mph in 2.9 seconds. The Lamborghini Aventador LP 700-4 makes its big screen debut--and probably one of its...

Friday, January 10, 2014
$16.94 from Amazon »

Brandon Stanton started his blog Humans of New York in the summer of 2010 in an effort to capture a "photographic census of New York City." The strange, the beautiful, the inspiring, the struggling. The people who say, "A...

Thursday, March 21, 2013
By: LumiLor

Last time you attended a rave or pimped your ride with EL wire, I bet you thought, "This electroluminescent technology is sick...but I wish I had it in sprayable form." Well, meet LumiLor, the answer to your prayers. LumiLor...

Wednesday, August 14, 2013
$18,611 from Firebox.com »

Time to brush up on curving the cue ball. Here are a few observations about bananas and pool and Banana Pool Tables:...

Friday, October 12, 2012
$50.95 from Yandy »

Ahhh, a Sexy Straitjacket Costume. The pinnacle of Sexy WTF Costumes--narrowly beating out the Sexy Hamburger--and a fun way to perpetuate the stereotype that all hot chicks are crazy. Why be a Sexy Nurse or a Sexy Cop or...

Tuesday, May 7, 2013
$19.95 from Hoodie Pillow »

Shark Tank strikes again. The Hoodie Pillow, another concept first introduced on ABC's entrepreneurial cattle call, has debuted a travel version of its fleece snooze-time companion. In this case, the namesake hood connects...

Sunday, May 5, 2013
$18.90 from Etsy »

Yesterday was May 4th and son of a bitch if I didn't bone the opportunity to run these Star Wars prints and say, "May the 4th be with you." And today is May 5th, another special day, particularly for the peoples of Mexico...

Saturday, November 23, 2013
$31.89 - $89.95 from Amazon »

When you're finished Monopoly-izing zombies in the Walking Dead version, I triple dog dare you to get into the holiday spirit with A Christmas Story's take on the beloved board game. Who wants to have a BB gun-off for the...

Wednesday, May 29, 2013
$99 from Melon »

Melon says, "Imagine if you could see and understand the invisible activity of your brain." Hmmm. Given that the brain activity of which I am conscious would probably get me ejected from many public places and kicked in the...

Friday, August 23, 2013
$15 from indiegogo »

You know how some people pour vodka in their eye or, like, soak a tampon in it and then stick it up their butt to get drunk quick and calorie-free? Well now there's a similar--albeit safer and way less disgusting--way to introduce...

Thursday, August 9, 2012

The PRJ016 iPhone 4 Micro Projector is a revamped version of Sanwa's original smartphone sleeve, which magnifies handheld microcosmic visuals, and then blares them into macrocosm across walls or white screens for large format...

Monday, May 28, 2012
$11.70 from Amazon »

After all the recent hype over breastfeeding, I think it's about time we returned to a matter of real public interest: poo. Specifically, dropping a deuce at the office. How to Poo at Work is the #1 guide for handling the...

Tuesday, August 6, 2013
Discontinued

Sometimes in the great out of doors you get gunk or crud or straight up shit on your hands and would like to clean it off without dumping out half of your water supply in the process. Sometimes it is approximately 172 degrees...

Sunday, April 29, 2012
By: Behance

Papilla is a USB (and battery) powered lunch box that will reheat its contents. Turkish industrial designer Burcin Ceren Olcum created it so that busy professionals and people on the go have an option to enjoy healthy, homemade...

Sunday, April 8, 2012
$760 from VITEOSHOWER »

The only thing better than a water shower cascading down from above is a water shower shooting up from below. Champions of bidets and enemas, you know what we're talking about, 'ey? And though the photos depict fancy frolicking...

Tuesday, January 17, 2012
$3.99 from 55 Hi's »

Ladies, the answer to your age-old question, "What are you thinking about?" has materialized in greeting card format. 78% of the time you query your man about his internal musings, this is the perpetual, 14-word loop running...

Monday, May 7, 2012
$7.21 from Amazon »

Mmm, from dead fetus to sharp shooter. I'm going to take a shot at loading the Hand Gun Egg Fryer Mold into the Rule of Thirds, as described by my 9th grade English teacher. He said that a third of the people we meet throughout...

Wednesday, May 8, 2013
$39.99 - $99.99 from Amazon »

The beauty of Limeade Blast stems from the suckage of smartphones and tablets. Both that they suck up battery power like a 12-pound newborn on a teat, and that this inadequacy of smartphone and tablet batteries really sucks....

Tuesday, September 25, 2012
$1,235 from TradeMe »

A set of dueling pistols created by Kiwi artist Bruce Mahalski is now up for auction with a starting bid of around $1,235 American dollars. They include spare bullets and come in a custom-altered case with blood-red inlay...

Wednesday, January 18, 2012
$122.95 from Amazon »

Do you believe in the power of the human mind? If you said yes, and you are not a Buddhist monk, yogi master, hypnotist, or cult leader, you probably also believe in The Force. But while belief in The Force is one thing, mastery...

Tuesday, March 5, 2013

I bet you didn't know Eva Unit 01 was also highly adept at manipulating the three states of matter. Well, two of the three anyway. Here to keep your home or office moist and safe from itchy skin and dry eyeballs is the Neon...

Tuesday, October 1, 2013
$299.99 from Amazon »

I don't know how practical zooming through the terminal atop my scooter-fitted carry-on would be in LAX or ATL, but the next time I get delayed by a snowstorm in Des Moines, drag racing with the courtesy transporters is on....

Tuesday, March 6, 2012
$149 from Custom Made »

Your face on the wedding cake topper? Hell yeah! This is, after all your mother f'in' day, and for once, just once, everything damn well should be all about you! Oh, and whomever that person standing next to you in front of...

Friday, August 23, 2013
$15.66 from Amazon »

I'm not sure whose poor planning skills decided The Snacking Dead: A Parody in a Cookbook should be released after the October 13th Season 4 opener of The Walking Dead, thus eliminating all of its potential profits from themed...

Saturday, July 20, 2013
$19.99 from Amazon »

We as humans have such cold-blooded and violent feelings towards insects as a species. We could sympathetically and euphemistically "eliminate" and "dispose of" them, but instead we swat, squash, zap, smash, exterminate, and...

Friday, October 26, 2012
$27.99 from Amazon »

If we can teach rats to run mazes and cows to jump over moons, why not teach fish to kick a soccer ball or swim through hoops? The R2 Fish School Fish Training Kit, developed by master trainer of the gilled ones Dr. Dean Pomerleau...

Wednesday, July 24, 2013
$29.95 from Amazon »

Companion Cubes. Companion Ice Cubes. A Captain Obvious merchandising exploit that kind of manages not to sacrifice coolness in spite of it. Even those unfamiliar with the Portal universe might gravitate towards this silicone...

Saturday, February 18, 2012
$9,650 - $10,795 from InboxFitness »

Monowheels, or monocycles--huge, single-track circus contraptions riders sit inside instead of on top of--have been around since the late 19th century, and were at one point proposed for use as a serious mode of transportation....

Tuesday, January 31, 2012
$13.50 from Etsy »

Balrogs and horndogs beware! These gold-emblazoned ladies' hot shorts guard the Secret Fire and they will not avail your advances! Undies are American Apparel brand, and come in S, M & L. Check out the size guide photo prior...

Wednesday, September 5, 2012
$23 from OPPO »

Oh man, I really hope dogs aren't smarter than we think they are. Does it get more humiliating than a Duckface Muzzle? Quack, an OPPO Japan bit of "You poor canine bastard" is a soft silicone dog muzzle available in yellow...