A Geek's Gift Guide of Gadgets, Gear and Novelties    * Updated daily

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Tuesday, November 13, 2012
Discontinued

Back in July, New Orleans natives Trey DeArk and Terence Green ran a Kickstarter project for their slick reappropriation of the iPhone 4/4S' built-in LED camera flash and iOS' LED Flash Alerts called FLASHr. Now they're back...

Saturday, June 29, 2013
$23.44 - $40.62 from Etsy »

My Zombie Apocalypse plan is to collect things like hand grenades and hacksaws and tins of beans, and then collect them all in miniature charm versions to wear on a bracelet or necklace. Like, so I can show them off handily...

Wednesday, May 15, 2013

No one complain that SeaDuction's amphibious cabanas are available only at tropical resorts, and not for public purchase, because I know that even if they were up for general grabs, all I would hear is more complaints: "Cool...but not $15,000 cool," and "$15,000 for a raft and some coolers?!" and "I'll stick with my $4.99 floaties from Target, thank you very much." And anyway, I'm sure if you contacted...

Tuesday, February 14, 2012
Discontinued

Digital passwords, encryption software, purity rings, and LDS allegiance all claim to guard the goods, but they don't physically lock them. Said goods are still vulnerable to breaches, negligence, or too many shots of tequila...

Saturday, January 21, 2012
$187.04 from Amazon »

Even though it's scaled to 1/20th of its original size, this historically accurate replica of Edward the First's response to the 1304 siege on his Stirling Castle could still probably catapult most of your neighbors' free-roaming...

Tuesday, April 9, 2013
$1.2 million from Hennessey »

Earning the title of World's Fastest Hypercar...available for consumer purchase...means hitting a top speed of 265.7 mph at the United States Naval Air Station Lemoore in Central California, and claiming to still have the juice (and balls) to put out more if it weren't for the 2.9 mile runway distance restriction. It means not quite matching top speeds of the Veyron Super Sport (267.8 mph) but...

Wednesday, October 10, 2012
$109.99 from GearUp »

"Crovel", like "spork", is a portmanteau word. It combines "Shovel" and "Crap! I'm gonna get impaled, sawed, and scooped all at once!" GearUp's latest in a respectable line of survival tools, the Crovel Tactical weighs only...

Wednesday, November 27, 2013
Sold Out from Amazon »

Good news, Clark Griswolds of the world. If you don't have 7 hours to spend staple gunning 700,000 strands of lights to your house this year, you can still xenon-bomb Julia Louis-Dreyfus and her husband out of their midnight...

Tuesday, September 18, 2012

I feel like the Treadwall--a rock wall on a treadmill-style conveyor belt--might be the ultimate example of something that appears to be really easy, but in practice makes 80% of its users look like complete assholes. Kind...

Thursday, September 26, 2013
$29.49 from Amazon »

It's obvious what the Mangroomer is, so let's just cut to to the chase: what can this DIY back shaver do for you?...

If bat shit looked like 1000mW of ice-blue lightning, the S3 Spyder III Arctic Laser would be the physical manifestation of bat shit crazy. As it stands, the world's most powerful laser is just fuckin' nuts. Wicked Lasers' (absolutely, 100% legal) handheld bolt of pure spectral power counts amongst its marketable skills the ability to: Sear through ornery plastic, pop bitch-ass balloons, burn continuously, 24/7, without sustaining damage to its laser diode, function in 9 different operating modes, including Strobe, Constant Wave, SOS, Beacon, and Tactical Hibernation, emit 0.25 Lux of light at a distance of 6,856 meters, turn anyone it hits in the eye at a distance of 149 meters or less into Ray Charles, minus the musical talent and soul.

And if that weren't enough to get it laid every day for the duration of its 5,000+-hour serviceable life, Guinness is currently testing the S3 Arctic for the official title of World's Most Powerful Laser.

The S3 Arctic Series Laser resides in an aircraft grade aluminum chassis that's smaller than a standard flashlight.

Saturday, July 14, 2012
$89.99 from Amazon »

OUYA creators Julie Uhrman and Yves Behar have said it best: There is nothing more gratifying than chillin' on the couch in Goodwill scrubs and a Nightwing hoodie, sipping on grape Fanta, and getting the news that the princess...

Friday, April 27, 2012
Discontinued

What's better than a girl wearing skin-sucking Lycra pants with legs smattered in Tetris blocks? A girl wearing no pants. With an ass smattered in Tetris blocks. Just in time for the heat, the beach, and the pubescent teenagers...

Wednesday, March 5, 2014

What I like about this Kraken umbrella is the inside, which features a giant Kraken. What I like significantly less about this Kraken umbrella is the outside, which features a mess of curlicued, doily-looking sea life and...

Sunday, February 10, 2013

While being on the receiving end of a buzzing, pesky winged bug's attentions can prompt minor fits of rage, I feel like if I could control the insect, and make it evoke these sentiments and actions from those who are not me...

Thursday, April 18, 2013
$4 from Etsy »

I can't tell if these temporary tattoos are attractive or look like someone taped a doily to your eye, but I think girls will like them, so as a nod to girls, I'm going to award Man Nga Liu's makeup alternatives relatively...

Tuesday, November 15, 2011
By: Shapeways

Cobb's totem from the film Inception has ripped through the seams of fiction and is now available for purchase in stainless steel, glass, sandstone, and about a dozen other dreamy colors and materials. It spins 90 seconds...

Monday, December 31, 2012
$19.62 from Amazon »

People who cannot read Japanese rejoice. Dark Horse Books and Nintendo have published an English version of The Legend of Zelda: Hyrule Historia, which is now available for pre-order. The Triforce unites and soars to the Western...

Monday, December 3, 2012
$9.19 from Amazon »

The definitive building block of food porn now has its own erotic cookbook. Fifty Shades of Bacon, about damn time. Right, ladies? 'Cause I know once you satiate your carnally voyeuristic instincts reading Fifty Shades of...

Monday, March 19, 2012

McFly! I pity the fool who lives in the UK, and doesn't get Pussy Galore on the road in one of these famed vehicle replica rentals. Yeah, baby! From Back to the Future's DeLorean and the A-Team van, to James Bond cars and...

Tuesday, February 11, 2014
$245 from Etsy »

Stereotypes collide in this brainy game meets brawny hardware Tool Chess set. Each piece has been handcrafted from real nuts and bolts, plus additional steel flourishes to distinguish powder coated black and white pawns, knights...

Sunday, February 3, 2013
$549 from Amazon »

I prefer to use my coffee table to play old school Nintendo, but I understand there are some out there even older school than I am who are more down with using theirs to play foosball. By the way, to those under the age of...

Friday, April 5, 2013
Discontinued

The lamp is a 1" black iron pipe and its fixture is a vintage recycled glass insulator and the Mario hovering above the decorative green pipe is the light pull! Sweeeeet! Mama! I need to borrow 199 dollars. And 35 cents. No...

Friday, May 11, 2012
$139 from Tokyo Flash »

And the best part is, no one will ever suspect it's a watch! The Kisai 7 LED watch is another trippy, limited edition Tokyoflash creation, with two rings and two L-bars of searing blue pronouncing the hours and minutes of...

Monday, March 5, 2012
$90 from Shapeways »

Still wish you could put a face to the name? This visual interpretation of omniscient audio-lord of the iPhone, Siri, was SaGa Design's entry into the Siri Design competition, and can now be part of your iPhone cover collection--and...

Tuesday, June 19, 2012
$66.39 from Amazon »

Something tells me that 90% of the time someone buys a Giant Inflatable Penis Costume, it's to give to someone else. But what's wrong with wanting to walk around dressed as a 7-foot tall penis yourself? I mean, I act like...

Wednesday, October 3, 2012
$31.50 from Etsy »

Now that our taste for Dexter-flavored blood has been satiated, and Season 7 is in full swing, let's take a moment to review all of our favorite fictionalized serial kills. So in Season 1 there was that church choir master...

Friday, November 30, 2012
$175 - $525 from Etsy »

Tired of taking shots in the dark? Then how about a little bang! bang! that lights up the night? Ryan Weigner hand-finesses ceramics slipcast-style to create illuminating firearms in 9mm sconce and table, as well as AK-47...

Sunday, November 18, 2012
$129.95 from Amazon »

Find out whose pants are on fire from the comfort of your own living room and USB port. The USB Polygraph for in-home use (read: barrels upon barrels of monkeys, particularly when anyone expected of cheating or doing other...

Friday, March 23, 2012
$40 from Mantis Knives »

The Bottleneck butterfly knife: skin a deer, then pop a beer. Mantis Knives teamed up with fraternal duo Gavin and Grant Hawk a couple years ago to design a special blend of blade. The Bottleneck BK-3b is sized like a keychain...

Monday, December 2, 2013
$64.95 from Amazon »

At first I was like, This is the ugliest ugly Christmas sweater I've ever seen. It is so ugly it's not even ironic, it's just ugly. Then my (newly single!) friend Cornelius reminded me it looks like Will Ferrell as Buddy the...

Sunday, December 29, 2013
$80 - $150 from Etsy »

In stark contrast to how I feel about bellybuttons, if I got one of Shannon Conrad's interlocking LEGO rings, I would much rather have an outie than an innie....

Friday, February 21, 2014
$99.95 from DropLED »

To confirm the accuracy of its name, someone subjected the DropLED Pro Harsh Duty Bulb to a few tests. 300 direct hits to a cinder block. Crushing under a forklift. Placing against the interior side of Drax the Destroyer's...

Thursday, March 7, 2013
$11.15 from Amazon »

The Snuggie Sutra, Lex Friedman and Megan Morrison's how-to guide to fleecing up your sex life, brings 3 things to mind. 1) The lingering misery of winter. 2) March Madness. 3) Yam bags....

Tuesday, September 4, 2012
Sold Out from Etsy »

Let's preface this pimp of Danilo Buendia's Breaking Bad Blue Glass Meth Rock Candy with the obvious: rock candy is pretty easy to make oneself. Even Blue Glass rock candy. Certainly easier than Blue Glass meth, and probably...

Sunday, July 8, 2012
$14.14 from Amazon »

It's possible that the Grilled Pizza Cone Set is just another culinary gimmick and general letdown in the spirit of the Slap Chop and Eggstractor, but holy balls nestled cool and dry in a pair of silk boxers do those pepperoni...

Friday, November 8, 2013
$17 from Etsy »

I love scotch. Scotchy, scotch, scotch. Here it goes down, down into my belly.... I don't know what I like more: that Etsy vendor Albert Hernandi of miniBIGS made a LEGO Ron Burgundy minifig, or that he made a LEGO Scotch...

Monday, September 19, 2011
$100 from Hobby Search »

Everyone knows that Japanese people are out of their fucking minds a little bit eccentric when it comes to... everything, but that's why we love them. This streaking flashing banana, I think, captures that eccentricity pretty...

Monday, November 7, 2011
Discontinued

And finally, after more than 25 years, the long awaited update to the Commodore 64. This was my very first computer actually. My dad took me to NYC where he was shooting a commercial for a toy company. They had all of these...

Saturday, July 13, 2013
$14 from archer »

Archer's macho-scented room sprays have a lofty goal: putting a positive spin on the statement that a place smells like 5 guys living in a 2-bedroom apartment. Can they succeed? I don't know, but hauling out scents such as...

Tuesday, October 1, 2013
$25 from Bakery Ave. »

I guess you could make cheeseburger cupcake brownies yourself if you know how to bake cupcakes and brownies, and apply icing without squirting it all over your kitchen cabinets, but I don't. Also, things always taste better...

Saturday, January 5, 2013
$13.95 from Amazon »

Omnio's WOW-Keys merges the PC/Mac world of full-size QWERTY with the iPhone. Type on the keyboard to input text into an iPhone, or to give commands to a computer from the iPhone. Or just use it as a standard desktop keyboard...

Thursday, October 10, 2013
Sold Out from Amazon »

I'm not on the best of terms with my smoke alarm. First it fell from the ceiling and went off. Then I left a few pounds of bacon in the skillet for too long and it went off. Then I had this girl over to watch Major League...

Thursday, April 25, 2013
$79.99 from ThinkGeek »

Do I want a 5-foot foam sword with a 45-inch blade and beaming blue LEDs? Uh, does Cartman want some Cheesy Poofs? More importantly, is a rhetorical question referencing South Park still culturally relevant?...

Wednesday, July 17, 2013
$12.05 from Amazon »

Everyone loves superheros. Super villains. Super powers. Super tales of good vs. evil. And flashy graphics. Don't forget the loud spectral colors and ripped/buxom exaggerations of flashy graphics. That's the allure of comic...

Sunday, November 24, 2013
$349 from Pet Chatz »

The simulation of being at home when you're not at home. It's the new black. And from smartphone-controlled security systems to interactive pet communication systems like the Petcube and, now, PetChatz, the application of...

Thursday, November 7, 2013
$160 from 80stees.com »

By the power of Greyskull! No, wait, that's not it. It's Morphin time! Uh...getting closer, but...no. Hold on...ah, here we go. These robotic lion fangs were impeding the movement of my cerebral neurons. Activate interlock!...

Thursday, February 13, 2014
$10.77 from Amazon »

Plate Dip Clips attach to plates and hold dip. So it won't bleed all over your food before you're ready for it, or nuzzle up to items it isn't meant to touch, or run amok on the flat plate surface and become more of a scrape...

Friday, April 5, 2013
Sold Out from Etsy »

Needle-felted Absolem, blue, hookah-sucking caterpillar from Alice in Wonderland, you look a little too real for me. If I got high I would definitely try to converse with and befriend you. I might do that even if I weren't...

Saturday, July 20, 2013
$195 from Goorin Bros. »

I'm pretty sure Macklemore, that Caucasian rapper from the Pacific Northwest, spoke of this hat in his song about wearing your grampy's coat and purchasing clothes from a thrift shop. Funny how milliner Goorin Bros. can smack...

Monday, April 2, 2012

The Cybertecture Mirror allows us to gaze simultaneously upon the two things we like gazing upon best: the Internet and ourselves. A glass reflection of both beatific mugs, and streaming Web content, the futuristic mirror...

Wednesday, February 15, 2012
$1,395 from Air Combat USA »

No matter how deep Tom Cruise sinks into Scientological insanity, or how pudgy and disconnected from reality Val Kilmer becomes, will there ever be a red blooded American male who wouldn't put a full nelson on the chance to...

Thursday, February 20, 2014
Sold Out from Amazon »

Jade Monk's demonic-looking Japanese spirit animals would like to offer you a "tremendously refreshing" pouch of powder containing 7 cups of green tea nutrients and enough caffeine to turbocharge your mind and body for up...

Wednesday, June 26, 2013
$4.24 from Amazon »

Noah Levenson took 15 principles from MTV2's Guy Code and funneled them into his daily life in an attempt to realize his full potential as a man. The result? He has overtaken the body of Chuck Norris. Guy Code: Unleash Your...

Monday, October 8, 2012
Discontinued

Richard Nagy, aka "Datamancer", specializes in handcrafted steampunk and retro-Victorian keyboards. His latest model, the Diviner, combines the two for an elegant assemblage of red mahogany woodwork and microchips. With matching...

Tuesday, September 24, 2013

Weebles wobble but they don't fall down, and Bodice Rockers fall down but they get right back up and stand just as tall as they did before. So I guess they're more similar to Rocky Balboa than Weebles. But they're not fighters...

Monday, December 31, 2012
Discontinued

Bring the Nolanverse to your living room with a set of Dark Knight bookshelves. Made to order. Just beam your Bat-Signal into the sky and designer Fahmi Sani will get to work erecting a set of webbed-winged night stalkers...

Sunday, September 29, 2013
$56 - $112 from Edge of Belgravia »

It's cool how one color option for these ceramic knives is Zombie-Slaying Green, so I can pretend I'm hacking up the flesh and bones of the undead each time I try to slice an onion without crying like the doctor just slapped...

Saturday, June 16, 2012
$175 from Etsy »

Cosplay, Comic-Con, even the swimming pool. Yes, this handwoven chainmail bikini top is waterproof and primed for a summer of splashing, floating, and breaststroking medieval style. All that's missing is the sea serpent raft...

Saturday, April 7, 2012
$23.90 from Amazon »

Do you have a (glow-in-the-dark, searing lime) green thumb? Do you want one? We can't promise this bioluminescent mushroom habitat kit comes with brownie recipes and resultant rainbow vision, but even without the magical effects...

Friday, April 13, 2012
$850 - $1,500 from Etsy »

It's Friday the 13th. Do you feel the eeriness? The rumblings of misfortune and chaos? Look outside. Is there something strange in your neighborhood? Anything weird that don't look good? Well forget about the phone. There's...

Monday, October 28, 2013

Gizmo on a swimsuit? What fool thought that was a good idea? It's the one article of clothing whose expressed purpose in life is to bask in the sunlight and get wet. Mogwais can't be exposed to bright light. And MOGWAIS CAN'T...

Wednesday, March 13, 2013

Time Machine Rental.com will neither confirm nor deny the functionality of their DeLorean's flux capacitor, but they do make mention of animated interior interfaces and buttons and switches that light up like a Christmas tree...

Saturday, August 18, 2012
$80 - $100 from The Ave Venice »

Dexter, Walter White, Jesse Pinkman, Rick Grimes, Ron F**king Swanson, they already hold a place close to our hearts. Thanks to the design maestros at Tauntr.com, so too can they hold a place close to our corns, callouses...

Wednesday, April 2, 2014
$42 - $49 from Amazon »

I see how the ease of just tossing a blaring alarm clock on its head to turn it off could be very dangerous for some people. If you don't have to work for the deactivation--dig for a minuscule button, chase a rolling or flying...

Friday, February 1, 2013
$150 from Pebble »

One of the most successful Kickstarter campaigns of all time, the Pebble E-Paper watch for iPhones and Androids is getting closer to large-scale production and sale. The self-proclaimed "infinitely customizable" timepiece...

Tuesday, March 19, 2013
$74.99 from Amazon »

The Leap Motion Controller, a sort of hands-free mouse with far more calibrated skills, sounds so wicked I don't even care that I'm going to look like an epileptic mime waving my arms around to use it. Though unassuming in...

Saturday, March 9, 2013
$62.95 from Etsy »

True, it is dangerous to go alone, but it is also dangerous to go in the dark. Take a Triforce lamp with you to light the way and remind all you encounter that wisdom, courage, and power are still the keys to Hyrule domination...

Wednesday, February 19, 2014
$49.99 from Amazon »

The only thing that could improve the experience of sinking my ass into a couch would be being able to set my sodie and plate of waffle fries down right next to me. Like, immediately adjacent to my sunken ass. This would eliminate...