Household

ZWILLING Enfinigy Personal Blender

$99.95 Amazon »

I cannot pronounce the name of the ZWILLING Enfinigy Personal Blender...well, I mean, except for the "personal blender" part...but no matter. My mouth is perfectly capable of doing much better things than pronouncing...

PlantOGram Live Frantoio Olive Container Tree

$108.55 Amazon »

Oooh, freshly picked olives from...your living room? If you decide to keep PlantOGram's live Frantoio Olive Container Tree indoors, yep. Freshly picked olives direct from your living room. Olive it!...

Dinosaur Hanukkah Menorah

$59.99 Amazon »

I wouldn't have named it the Dinosaur Hanukkah Menorah. I would have called it the T-Rex Dinosorah. But, I don't work for Zion Judaica Ltd, and I'm not "Margarita," the person who designed this cretaceous candle holder...

Champagne Bottle Balloon Kit

$15.99 Amazon »

An 88-piece Champagne Bottle Balloon Kit you can inflate and use to decorate down the stairs, up the wall, arcing over the window, any which way you want?! This DIY decor looks like a job for...not this dude. Uh-uh. No...

Golden Girls Christmas Ornaments

Sold Out Amazon »

Make Christmas spectacularly silver (-haired) and Golden (Girls) this year with a set of glass Golden Girls Christmas Ornaments. Head-to-toe you'll get Dorothy, Blanche, Rose, and Sophia in moderate facial likenesses...

Chunky Braided Chenille Throw Blanket

$80 Amazon »

"Holey" isn't typically a characteristic I look for in blankets, but despite being all holey this Chunky Braided Chenille Throw Blanket still manages to look warm, inviting, and ready to go with you and give you rest...

Well Hung Naughty Christmas Ornament

$8.39 - $9.99 Amazon »

Is that a finger wiggling around in the Well Hung Naughty Christmas Ornament, or are you just happy to...defile the Christmas tree with a mock cock & balls to get some cheap jollies?...

WohnGeist Tools Luxury Cabinet

$15,540 SwissMade Direct »

WohnGeist Tools has created a Luxury Cabinet of screwdrivers and wrenches, saws and hammers, drills and files, pliers and pry bars, all mounted neatly inside an elegant pear wood cabinet you may, in turn, mount on your...

YouCopia FreezeUp Freezer Food Block Maker

$16.99 Amazon »

Oh, Mama. Have I got a YouCopia of goodness coming your way! These FreezeUp Freezer Food Block Makers might be the best invention since the freezer itself. Do you realize you will now be able to make me, like, triple...

Savor The Vault Organizational & Keepsake Boxes

$44.95 - $164.90 Amazon »

Get sentimental, get organized, get your goods close at hand, and then get it out of sight with Savor's The Vault line of handsome, fabric-covered book boxes...

Waterfall Kitchen Sink

$379.99 - $399.99 Amazon »

Give your dirty dishes and unwashed produce the spa treatment with this Waterfall Kitchen Sink. The back of the stainless steel insert is fitted with a sweet twist on the sprayer, a row of tiny nozzles that eject water...

Cognitive Biases Wall Poster

Oh how I love to read about cognitive biases to see all the ones that apply to my father-in-law, my Aunt Jan, and my black-hearted ex-girlfriend Karen...

Santa Frozen in Carbonite Christmas Ornament

$14.95 Amazon »

Ho, ho, h-oh no! Santa Claus has gotten himself into a Carbonite pickle! He might survive as Han Solo did, but wasn't Han also frozen up in the stuff for, like, a year? Bad news, kids. I wouldn't waste my time with cookies...

Telescoping Christmas Ornament Storage Box

Sold Out Amazon »

Decorating the Christmas tree: fun, festive, and full of egg-nog-filled Moose Mugs. Un-decorating the Christmas tree: suckage. Usually accompanied by tedious ornament wrapping, a few broken ornaments, string light bulb...

Multi-Colored New York Dinner Knife Set

$39 Articture »

This fetching Multi-Colored New York Dinner Knife Set is for everyone on your holiday gift list who doesn't wish for silver and gold...cutlery. The collection includes 7* serrated knives, each a completely different bold...

Atomi Smart Tabletop Space Heater

$99.99 Amazon »

Conquer drafty rooms and thermostat dictators who refuse your freezing bones anything above 64 degrees with the Atomi Smart Tabletop Space Heater. The portable unit's 1500W PTC ceramic heating technology needs just 2...

The Vast Land Incense Burner Lamp

$95.99 Amazon »

The Vast Land Incense Burner Lamp is supposed to be a great companion for yoga or meditation, but looking at it kinda brings me the opposite of relaxation and peace. That lone figure walking along a barren terrain of...

Cactus Christmas Tree

$89.99 - $139.99 Amazon »

A Cactus Christmas Tree this year, huh? How very...southwest of you, Mama. No, dudes, this bastardization of one of the best parts of the holidays doesn't resonate with me either. I don't care how much it fits into the...

Mushroom Mycelium Pendant Light

$747 Myceen »

It doesn't look like a mushroom, it doesn't smell like a mushroom, and while I haven't licked this mushroom pendant light, I'm pretty sure it doesn't taste like a mushroom. Still. Myceen's nifty Pendant Lamp B-Wise is...

Minimalist Wall Hanging Christmas Tree

$24.72 Amazon »

Deck the halls with...no wait. Deck the walls - and really just one wall - with a Minimalist Wall Hanging Christmas Tree this year. Especially if space is at a premium, or you just got a new puppy or newly mobile baby...

iFu Mini Electric Screwdriver

$57.95 Amazon »

iFu calls the design of their Mini Electric Screwdriver "exquisite," and while I think that word should be reserved for old wines and revenge tactics, I will concede the aluminum alloy metal shell, one-piece molding...

The Root Christmas Tree Stand

$299 - $899 Garden Glory »

The Root is the Christmas tree stand to end all Christmas tree stands! ... Aaand pretty much the only decorative or visually interesting Christmas tree stand I've ever seen at all. The gold and silver Roots are pretty...

Fuginator Scrub Brush for Tile & Grout

$12.94 - $13.89 Amazon »

Tile and grout cleaning with the Fuginator Scrub Brush, now how crazy fun does that sound, dudes?! I know. Just crazy, not fun at all. But have you checked your bathroom since partying over Halloween weekend, and eating...

Workstation Kitchen Sink

$590 - $1,390 Amazon »

I doubt these Workstation Kitchen Sinks from Ruvati are DIY installs, so in addition to the cost of buying one, you're going to have to suffer the cost - and hassle - of hiring someone to put it in. But still...damn...