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Fifty Farts Playing Cards

By: on February 14, 2015
Fifty Farts Playing Cards
$7.99
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Smells like a fun night of Texas Hold 'Em! The Fifty Farts deck of cards "serves as a taxonomy of the rectal expulsion of gas byproducts of the mammalian digestive process." Just like my own body after a 3-course dinner of chili with Cheetos, wet pork burritos, and chicken fried steak breaded in Doritos.

Fifty Farts lets rip your suits of aces, queens, kings, jacks, and tens, but you won't need to put them together to get a royal flush using this deck. Scientifically backed by...uh...science, the cards contain invaluable descriptions and symptoms for players to use in diagnosing 52 different varieties of flatulence (50 standard, plus 2 bonus farts). And you'll probably be able to apply at least 20 of them within the first hour of poker night.

Examples of the gaseous knowledge you'll glean from Fifty Farts include the "one-cheek sneak" and the "smoke screen." Happy Valentine's Day, sweetheart.